Anniversary dates of Ryan’s beating.
Every Cell in My Body is Crying It’s 3:12AM. The house is still and unlit. I can’t sleep. It’s just too much for me to bear. I hurt so badly. It’s EXACTLY twenty-four hours from the time Ryan was maliciously attacked four long years ago. This day, and tomorrow, will bring me to my knees…
The anniversary of Ryan’s brutal beating is just days away. Three days, to be exact. The week leading up to this is the worst… except for the actual day, November 7th. The day that everything changed forever. The day Austin Vantrease and Jonathan May (both of Newark, Delaware) reigned despair on my son and family…
What can I say on a day like this? Not a word could capture the heartbreak, despair, yearning, and anger. Besides, my thoughts a scattered and my emotions are not to be trusted. We miss our son. Oh, how we miss him. Every day it feels like he died all over again. We live a…
Yesterday was the seventh. Exactly twenty-three months since Ryan’s barbaric attack. Like every month on the seventh, I was sad. It’s the type of despair that weighs heavy. Like a cold, wet blanket. The type of feeling where I become acutely conscious of my breathing. Every breath is noticed and occasionally I must remind myself…
Summer is now unofficially over. Another season comes and goes without me hardly noticing. A summer void of family vacation, nights at the ball game, reunions, sipping a cold drink on the porch, cook outs, evenings going out for ice cream, and miniature golfing. I miss Ryan taking the top off the Jeep and feeling…