Yesterday was Father’s Day. I was acutely aware of it the instant I decided to get Ryan out of bed in the morning. For me, I did everything as normal… except for one thing.
I turned off my smartphone, closed my computer, and set the television remote control aside. My reason was simple, but I was certain I wouldn’t be able to articulate it. Fortunately, the very first post in my newsfeed — from another who grieves on special occasions — will do it for me. Well, it will do half of the explaining for me. It was written by one of Ryan’s longest friends who lost her father, Katie Mesmer.
These days have a way of sneaking up. The milestones. The holidays. The aching hole that, most days, you can convince yourself isn’t there. You’re okay, just strolling along, laughing at a GIF on Twitter or texting your best friend about something that happened to you. Everything is fine. It’s just another day. Until it isn’t. Until the calendar tells you. Until Facebook shows you photos of everyone celebrating. Until Instagram reminds you of your inability to take a new photo with him. Until Father’s Day Groupon emails taunt you with great deals on gifts you don’t need. – Katie Mesmer.
Yes, what Katie said is profound. She said this so perfectly that it reaches the soul of every child who has lost an exceptional parent. But, she expressed the reverse… a parent who has lost an extraordinary child.
Unlike Katie, I avoided this “social media heartache” by cutting it off (mostly) before it started. I isolated myself so forcefully that I didn’t even turn the lights on in the house.
Okay, so that’s half of it. That part hurts like unholy hell.
Still, this year was different. On top of this despair, I was flat-out offended and angry.
I lost all respect for the day. How, I wondered, can I reconcile that certain “dads” get equal accolades. I speak of those who, in my opinion, have failed at fatherhood. Take Robert (Bob) Vantrease, for example. He fathered and raised his son, Austin Vantrease, into a violent felon. He, for one, surely isn’t worthy of reaping the praise of Father’s Day. The results of all three of his offspring speaks clearly… Bob Vantrease sucked at it.
In the name of Dads far-and-wide, I would call for his testicles to be revoked, but we’d have to pry them out of his pussy-whippin’ wife’s purse. In case I wasn’t clear, what I’m saying is that Bob is a wimp and his wife (Pattie “Gale” Vantrease) is an aggressive bruiser. In case you’ve never seen Bob or Gale, let’s use the words of George Orwell as an indication, “At 50, everyone has the face [they] deserve”.
Anyhow, having the likes of Bob Vantrease lumped in with me on Father’s Day has rubbed me entirely the wrong way for years. It was hard, but I could (somewhat) look past it because it wasn’t him who physically kicked the existence from my son.
What I simply cannot excuse is having Austin Vantrease on equal footing with me in any way… ESPECIALLY dad related items.For that rat-bastard, he gets to experience a day that I once held nearly sacred. This is his first Father’s Day.
Must Read! Click to read my article from January (it will open in a separate window/tab): Say it Ain’t So! Austin Vantrease: Baby Daddy?
I wonder if he now feels the hurt that his attack reigned down on my child?… and me as a father? From all I know of him and his behavior, he’s still completely clueless.
While I’m at calling out awful parents, I say this to Stephanie’s, “What in the hell is wrong with your rearing skills? You instilled your daughter’s bottom-dwelling standards; to willingly become impregnated by a monster… and risk an innocent child to known violence against those unable to defend themselves… like a child?”
You must be so proud.
As that child’s grandparents you’d be wise to never forget that he kicked an unconscious man in the head over a sports team; how long will it be until his child sets off his impulsive violence?
So, for me, I denounce Father’s Day because of its indiscriminate well-wishing of a productive ejaculate. While I’m at it, there are a few leaders in the history of our country that I deem unworthy… so screw President’s Day too!
Please don’t forget Ryan’s Wish List! With people being busy in the summer months, it is always the toughest time of the year.