I really don’t bring this up anymore, but today is the seventh of the month. Although I keep it to myself, I still suffer. The seventh is always a rough day. It was on November 2009. It is today.
The only reason I’m sharing it with you today is because I’m attending a legal procedure tomorrow where those named in the civil suit, specifically Austin Vantrease and Jonathan May, can do the right thing. Will they? Well, I’ll keep an open mind and hope… despite the time that has passed without doing so (in my opinion). Despite the low-crawling attempt to get a list of donor’s personal information (that was flatly denied by a Federal Court). Despite the bickering over a mere $25,000 in criminal restitution. That last one, the $25,000, is an indicator to me that they really don’t get it.
I’m doing this for my son’s sake. I hope they will too. After all, it’s not “us against them” when it comes right down to it. It’s accountability to Ryan, and both sides must recognize this. It always has been. Ever since the night they sucker-punched and kicked Ryan into oblivion. Nothing has changed. There’s no going back.
Again, my concern is they just don’t know — and maybe don’t want to know — how much damage was done. A lifetime’s worth. I seriously doubt anyone is telling them. Momma wouldn’t want to hurt her boy’s feelings.
Do you realize it’s now three years and three months since Ryan was brutally attacked? That’s 1,185 days! Over twenty-eight-thousand hours. 1.7 million minutes. 102 million seconds to do the right thing for the damage caused. I’m telling you this, I wouldn’t wish even a single one of those seconds on (almost) anyone. Even one tick of the clock is one too many. It’s too much suffering. Oh, what all was lost…
Now, you know, I’m trying to be much more positive lately. So I’ll go into tomorrow with high hopes. But the best thing is that I get to spend some time with my daughter afterwards! That makes whatever comes beforehand worth it. I won’t mind leaving at three o’clock in the morning because I know that evening will be wonderful. I won’t be phased by that one person I’ll see that makes me feel like I need to shower off the nastiness that emanates from him/her. I’m just thinking out loud here, but I often wonder if this is the type of person who might even close down a mexican restaurant then pour their drink into their child’s sippy cup for the road? Hmm…
Which reminds me. I’ll do my best to behave myself. Maybe even buy a sippy cup for my personal entertainment and consumption. Bottom’s up.
Look out, Morgantown… K-Pimpin’ in the hood!