Disclaimer: Today’s post is peppered with my opinion. It’s my personal account of what I believe to be Gale Vantrease’s statement to the Parole Board. It’s my perception.
Gail Vantrease began by spending several minutes trying to discount a few of the things I said in the Victim Impact Statement. It was a bad tactic on her part, for sure (as you see, I’m already invoking my opinion). For example, she tells the Parole Board that her son was never involved in a fight while in Ocean City, MD. (which I asserted), but offers nothing more on the other fights he was in. Wow! Really? He was in fights… just not that one. Fine, she can believe what she wants (and I will do likewise), but thank you very much for that. Thank you, indeed.
The Vantrease Family at the criminal trial. L to R: Cody, Andraya, Gale, Bob.
Then Gale Vantrease spoke of this website, ryansrally.org, only giving one-side of the story. There’s another side? She makes the statement, “we can’t compete, nor do we want to”. She is both correct and incorrect. Yes, they can’t compete. No, they do (or did) want to. Do any of you remember the ill-conceived and poorly-executed website and Facebook Fan page? It was (or perhaps still is) titled “The Truth About Austin Vantrease”. These social sites crashed and burned in a matter of weeks after the public went on these and began commenting. People were outraged! The sites went from a public format to an invite-only quite quickly, thereby losing all relevance and significance. Funny, violent felons just don’t get the support the family thought.
Let’s not stop there. I already have plenty showing that the Vantrease family (and family of others) is visiting this website. Gale Vantrease confirmed it, saying every time they try to give their point of view through commenting that I call them out (e.g., providing the IP address and e-mail of the commenter). Yep, I thought, I certainly do that. What’s the point? It seemed pointless as she went on to say that the website’s readers unfairly rip their comments to shreds. Apparently, some must have felt this website’s disclaimer doesn’t apply to them. If you haven’t, take a bit to read it. I tried to make the otherwise boring legal mumbo-jumbo more entertaining.
Hey, if they want to give their “side of the story” then they should see if any media is interested or start their own website. Stop using my success and get the hell off my coattails. Oh. Wait. They already tried that. But how dare they use our highly-popular website as their platform! Truth is, their participation sky-rockets readership and I love it when this happens. But I’m steadfast in there being no way I’ll let them springboard off of this fan and support base.
Really, why is Gale Vantrease bringing this up in her son’s parole hearing anyhow. Again… wrong platform. I guess the best way to summarize her presentation, to this point, had a lot to do with the restraining order motion they filed against this website a few months back. A federal judge already dismissed the attempt to put a gag order on this website. It didn’t work then, and I believe it didn’t work now. I chalk it up as being a poor loser.
Then she turns on my wife, Sue. Gail Vantrease claims that Ryan’s story has garnered so much media attention because of Sue’s job with a major cable news company. Bull Patties! In fact, it’s EXACTLY the opposite. It makes it much more difficult. Her company has never been a factor in influencing or obtaining media attention. But, I tell you right now, if I could use this… I would. The Washington Post reached out to us, learning of the story from another website follower. The Today Show did the same and actually was competing with Good Morning America for exclusive airing rights. Gail even takes it further by claiming we have the power to influence what stories the Associated Press prints! I can tell you this, I had a good laugh about this with the media after the parole hearing. As one reporter simply stated, “That’s not how it works”. That’s correct… it doesn’t work that way at all. The AP is a news gathering service and follow journalistic ethics. They alone decide, from the existing news stories for the day, what they will put on the wire. In this case I don’t feel Gale Vantrease was deceiving, but I will assert she is ignorant on the process.
Gale Vantrease then tries to manipulate a statement I made, quoting me verbatim but not in complete context, in the May sentencing were I attributed brain injury to Jonathan May. I do believe I said this, that Jonathan May is responsible for the brain stem injury from Ryan hitting the back of his head against a raised grate and it rebounding, injuring the frontal lobes. Hell, I made that claim in my victim impact statement earlier in the parole hearing. She leaves out what I said just a few minutes before. That Austin is accountable for the balance of the damage; in the temporal lobes, occipital lobes, parietal lobes, cerebellum, and so on. Her argument is faulty because her logic is. It’s incomplete. Jonathan May’s results do not prevent or lessen Austin Vantrease’s. They both caused permanent damage. I suppose, by her way of thinking, if I come upon a person who is bleeding from another’s actions then I am okay to slit their neck because the bleeding was already happening.
It was at this point when my daughter, Kari, leaned into my ear and whispered, “She’s lying about everything.” I nodded and squeezed her hand.
We are well into her statement to the Parole Board and she has yet to speak to Austin’s release! She seemingly is more than put off by this website, its readers, media attention, and me. She is using her own son’s parole hearing to get these off her chest. I wonder to myself what she thinks her purpose is for being here today? So far, I’m confident she’s failing. By all means, carry on!
After all this, Gail Vantrease finally begins to fall in line with the purpose of the hearing. She talks of how Austin has a support system already in place. She says her family members take turns driving, up to 15 hours to visit him over seventy-some weekends, to visit him since he was convicted.
You know what I call a fifteen-hour day? Knocking off a few hours early. Poor baby has to give up some of her weekends to visit her felon son in prison. Boo-frickin’-hoo. It was insulting because she clearly didn’t recognize that we, the Diviney’s, make her periodic fifteen-hour weekends look pathetic. For us, it’s around the clock. Every single day. We make no distinction between a weekday and the weekend. They’re all the same to us. Please! She should pull thirty-six hour shifts. She should go three years without a day off. Like Sue, she should feel the exhaustion of working twelve-hour days and return home to care for her son throughout the night and all weekend. Please!
Then Gale Vantrease speaks to her son’s character. How he is humble. How is is not violent. What? Did I just hear that correctly? I have a son who is in a coma because of his violence that says otherwise. She uses an example of how the guard at the entrance to the North Central Regional Jail (where he spent some time) thinks Austin is a peach of an inmate. I can’t state this as fact, but I’m guessing it’s not any of the guards that have written-up Austin for violations recently.
Then she makes a statement about Ryan. My stomach rolls and tightens. “I feel sorry for Ryan. I’m heartbroken for Ryan,” she said. “He was a beautiful, perfect young man injured at 20 years old. It can’t be any worse than that.” Way to state the obvious! Okay, if she feels sorry for him, why has she done nothing to help him? What is preventing this family from helping him now? Believe me, this is not contingent upon her felon son being released. Gail Vantrease said Austin intends to pay his restitution to Ryan, but can’t do that in prison. Wrong! Do some homework on this before showing ignorance before the Parole Board. He can get a prison job. In fact, he has been advised to do so, but hasn’t even applied. Maybe it only pays $16 – $81 per month (of which up to 40% can go to restitution), but it’s a start. He doesn’t even need to do anything, I’ll see to it that it is taken from him!
She said she hoped something positive could come out of the tragedy, but conflicts between the two families have made that impossible. You know what, having your son beaten into a coma and being threatened outside a courthouse and in parking garages on multiple ocassions by another family can put a damper on that ever happening. Did she have hear fingers in her ears when I spoke of this earlier?
She begins wrapping up. “This will be with Austin the rest of his life and it will be with us.”
Yep. Ryan, too.
Geez… Mr Diviney, where do I start? I must first say how strong you and your family are. Your blogs are so powerful; you deserve so much credit for the way you have handled and continue to handle this devastating situation. I’ve read almost every blog entry. It’s sick to think that the family has not taken responsibility for their relatives’ actions. I actually am from Bear, DE… I grew up around Austin and was familiar with Jonathan May. Jon was always seen as a loser, and he still is. He deserves life in prison. LIFE in prison. Even though it is hard to come to terms with the fact that Austin was involved in this, since I knew him personally; it does not dispute the fact that he was WRONG. It does not change what he did. He deserves to spend his life catering to people in the same state as your son. He deserves to wait on them hand and foot, 24 hours a day to really understand what he did to your son. I cannot reiterate how sorry I am for what has happened to your son. Reading your entries on this website has made me emotionally involved in this and I’ve been spreading the word about signing the petition to keep Austin in jail. Even though it was hard to do, i felt good about actually doing it after the fact. I know the difference between right and wrong, and I know who was in the WRONG–Austin Vantrease and Jonathan May. No one deserves the violence your son was put through. Drinking or not, arguing or not, violence is never the answer. It seems to be a fad here in Delaware to try to fight other people when posed with a conflict. Not sure if it’s pure ignorance or stupidity but I’m sick of it, I’ve been sick of it for years; watching these rich upper-middle class guys (and girls) trying to fight to prove they’re something here in Delaware. I’m sorry your sons injuries were a product of that stupidity. Lives can be saved because of Ryans story; fights can be prevented, this is the positive side of this horrible situation. I don’t think you understand how powerful your words have been through all of this, and how uplifting it is to read your point of view throughout this long process. I will make it my personal goal to pray for you and your family, Mr. Diviney and most importantly, for Ryan. I see him making progress everyday and you’ve got so many people behind him rooting for him.
I am sorry. I do not know what i am talking about. after reading this hours after i posted my first (two comments) – it has confirmed to myself that i truly misread the situation i have done some more reading and apparently before commenting i must have read all of the wrong articles- i heave read many since then and now wish to take back many of my comments. I did not have a holistic view. I found that the majority of the articles i had read were from the beginning of the trial/ sentencing/ beginning. I now see how the family has changed , or rather adapted to their current situation- and their courage, willpower, honesty, love, and many other habits have truly blown me away. i do not know why i got so critical- was in a weird, sleep deprived funk. I do not apologize for only having the families best interest in my heart, namely ken; however, i did and do not know what their best interest is so i have no right to be telling them my input and or judging. as mentioned before, i cannot fathom what each of them has gone through and has had to scracifice. it blows me away.
best of luck ryan, you shall remain in my prayers for quite some time, as will your family.
Ken-
Firstly allow me to inform you of how sickening and upset the actions toward your son make me- after learning of what happened- I truly went sick to my stomach- which is not a normal occurrence. As I read into both sides of the story, however mainly on ryansrally, I found myself ranging through strong emotions that i have not experienced to that magnitude in quite some time. Emotions which made me angry, made me sad, led me to cry- and not just shed a tear, but truly cry- i have not cried in years. But what really led me to cry was reading and watching Kari’s input. I believe this story has truly touched me has to do with the fact that I am 21years old with a younger sister and attend a university similar to ryans- Pitt, a rival actually.
CAN YOU PLEASE-(when you have the time)-READ MY MESSAGE AS I HAVE PUT A LOT OF THOUGHT AND TIME INTO IT(i know its very long compared to most) ***********SO DO NOT FEEL OBLIGATED TO READ OR EVEN RESPOND************** as i will understand.HOWEVER… if you do decide to take the time to read it: I WOULD BE VERY PLEASED TO GET SOME SORT OF RESPOSE- (obvisouly not nearly as long)- BUT ANY RESPONSE REGUARDING ANYTHING I MIGHT HAVE SAID WOULD TRULY MAKE MY DAY-i would very much like to hear any feedback on anything i mentioned- or possibly some of your own feedback that might shed light onto your situation -possibly dealing with something that i might not understand,etc
As you read my next paragraph please know that I am in no way shape or form doubting you and the tremendous effort that you as a loving parent have put in to this tragic situation- i honestly admire you for all of your efforts- your love for both your son and your family is not to be doubted by anyone. However, I do believe at some point later in life you will realize that it will not matter how long Ryans attackers are locked up. I hate to say it but there is nothing that they can do to change the past that will help to bring him back- excluding them following through with their 100,000$ and possibly , though high unlikely, contribute in other ways to help raise money for you son. My point is- to dwell on the punishment of your sons attackers will not help your son or your family in the long run. In my opinion, I understand ( though i do not mean i can relate nor understand what you have went through) but I do understand that you would like justice to be served not only for ryan but also for you and your family; however, the only way i could see justice truly being served is for both of his attackers to be put in the same spot that he is in currently. I guess I do have one curious and genuine question for you now that i have just brought that up- What do you believe their sentences should be? (i suppose that this answer has two parts- 1st what do you truly believe it should be- as if you were able to hand out their sentence & 2nd- realistically what do you think they should be given/ what are you striving for their punishments to be) Life in prison? Death Sentence? 10years , 20 years? community service? [I apologize if you have talked about this else on the site and i have missed it] If i were in your shoes I honestly would have no idea what i would think- mainly due to the fact that I can’t possibly fathom what you and your family are experiencing. From an outsiders perspective i still go back and forth in my head about what would be the right verdict. one part of my says they deserve “equal” sentencing as they “sentenced” ryan- life in prison. but the other part of me – being able to relate to young adults of this age living in this generation- realizes that these kids did not have the intention of inflicting the harm that they did upon ryan. Fights are common on college campuses, as I’m sure they always have been, and the majority of the fights often start over nothing- normally one comment is made- and then taken the wrong way- and then fight. It is sad. But it happens, as far as the kick to the head- that is something you would not expect on a college campus- but rather in the ghetto or third world countries.
Nonetheless, it already happened. You are not alone in the struggle you are going through- particular to your exact situation- yes you might be alone- but as far as parents feeling helpless over something that has happened to their child- you are not alone. A girl i grew up with was attending college in NYC, she was not a drug user, not a heavy drinker, and was not a “slutty/seductive dresser”, a bright student, nice to everybody she met- and everybody recognized her for that.; she was heading home one night after midnight- on her way to hop on the subway- the next thing everybody found out was that she was raped and then murdered and then her corpse was thrown down into the subway tunnel tracks. This female did nothing to provoke her attackers, did nothing to start a fight, but like your son all she could do was run from the danger she was in, and like your son she could not escape and as a result was victimized. now i know that in many ways this does not relate to your story- mainly because her parents (her father a well-loved public school teacher) did not have to sacrifice countless hours tending to her needs which i can’t imagine how tough that must be- well i sort of can as i had my grandfather who suffered from a massive stroke and was the closest you could get to a coma without being unconscious- a lot of the care falls along similar lines i would imagine, though not as intense as ryans- and no where near as saddening and f’d up as his situation- but going back to my point- her parents could defiantly relate to the fact that their first born child was a victim to a crime that was truly cruely unfair and a nightmare, a crime that took a child away from their family- ryan is “still” with you- but i can imagine the heartache it is to see him in that state. Honestly, I do not know which case wold be easier- still physically having your child around- even with the suffering- but still with a small chance of a miracle – or having your child buried and hanging on to only the good memories. I know with my grandfather- the later option is true- yet, these aren’t comparable cases. but as i mentioned her parents cannot relate to the demands and heartache of tending to a child in a coma- there certiantly are other parents who can relate- take for example, a child who was driving home and was hit by a belligerent drunk driver- in this case the attacker was also drunk and reckless just by stepping into the vehicle.
The reason i brought these up is that in my outsider opinion, is that after reading enough of your stories, i feel your sorrow, but i also feel a dire urge for justice “/revenge” to be had- it is almost as if a war has started- i do realize the stuff your having to deal with the other family- which after all that has happened truly isn’t fair and really drives the knife further into the wound- but rather than fight- i believe a change of heart and a change of where your exerting your energy could do you so good. I am not saying forgive them right away as to find peace- because unlike the amish- this would and will take tremendous time- but one thing is certain – you cannot hold on to this hatred(for lack of a better word) for the rest of your life- well you could- but it will not do you any good focusing your energy on the attackers. The law of attraction [please see wikipedia if you do nothing else in response to this message] is a perfect example that even if your thinking about them negatively about them- that the result will have to bring upon negative results – even if their subtle. for example, parts of me have to agree with the intentions of MAUREEN who messaged you on sept3 around 10am. However, in your response (correct me if Im wrong) but i sensed some sarcasm – sarcasm to a woman who not only said how sorry they are just like the other 1000′s of people, but cared enough to recognize your pain and offer some of the best advice that she could to help you work on progression(something that will have to happen over time)- and she then provided you with examples (which she was not trying to say that they were similar situations) but she provided them as an example of how your actions and ways of thinking can effect your outlook on a situation- but much more importantly, your personal well being.
This Secction Is Extremely Oppinionated and does not reflect what i think about you , your character , or your families situation..please read the rest of the message:
{{the sarcasm i saw in your response i can also sense in some of your writing- which i take to be caused by frustration amount many other things- but i want to let you know that literally everyone out there who is aware of this incident feels deeply sorry for you and can’t imagine what you are going though- which is why a consistent mature response- trying to keep emotion to a minimum (and I’m not talking about love and personal emotion towards your family and the passage you may write concerning how your family has coped with this- but i am referring to the emotion dealing with the legal stuff-both in court And Online(like the paragraphs above)- sarcasm and be-raiding the attacker and his parents does no good for you- however, there are other methods to still get the same points across that your trying to bring to attention to, (now please do not taking this the wrong way- i am just trying to inform you the way people reading your response might intepreate your attitude – even though none of us have any idea and can’t even imagine walking a minute in your shoes) buy anyways I’m going to say it anyways and if you don’t like my oppion- please continue to read- because this is the only point at which i point out anything of this manner- the rest is positive so here it is..additionally, being sarcastic to the woman MAUREEN ,whether its true or not, appears as if you did not even consider her option with an open mind but rather played the game- “oh really? you had a bad situation? well it doesn’t stack up with mine so your advice is not something i want to hear”]}}
going back to”the amish was to serve as an example as to how your outlook can effect your well being”.. regarding loosing their loved ones-The amish community suffered just as much as you did- they expericed a massacre that was indeed intentional by the attacker- and in my opinion the point of that was not to tell you that you need to make amends and forgive them this moment and move on accordingly, but rather to illustrate how they were able to remain with as much peace as they possibly could after such a horrific tragedy. They were able to keep their thoughts positive and that showed as a result in the way they channeled their energy positively just take a second and think about it- what good would it have done for them to dwell on the justice of their attacker(regardless of his sentence)- how would it have helped them at all? In your case- rather than expel your energy online against fighting for your sons case and bringing down the men who did this to them- i believe that your effort could better be channeled into preventing acts like this to occur in the further – which don’t get me wrong- i believe you have already done that, and done it well, but i believe there is more to be done- the awareness can always grow-[take mothers against drunk drivers as an example, I’m sure all of them would have liked justice served and their childs killer or crippler to not be able to live a good life and have to suffer the consequences- but instead they channeled their efforts into preventing future attacks and raising awareness- consequently their actions based off the single loss of their child has served to save hundreds if not thousands of other children at risk- anything is possible if you put your mind to it- any one can make an impact- your son ryan can not only serve as a adult helping to further advancements in brain injures but also advancements in cracking down on fighting and abuse by other human beings- as i read in another comment(not me saying this, though it is logical- yet devastating)- being in the state he is- he has a chance to effect and change more lives than he could of if the attack never happened] anyways my point is things can be done to prevent future trajedies- and you are in a great position to lead this fight and thus possibly giving you a great purpose in your life beyond the duties as a father and loving parent- i just do not want you to suffer while having your energy focused on your sons attacks(and do not take this the wrong way- i know the majority of your energy is not being spent on these two men- but my point is none of your energy should be spent on them as it will not do you any good in the long run, think about how you want to be remembered after you are dead and gone ; as wells ryan- you do not want to be remembered as the man who fought desperately (for lack of a better word) agaist you sons attacks- trying to bring a false justice and attention to the horrible human beings that they are-you have much more potential- and though your actions so does ryan- more potential to “live forever” in memory more so than he already has and will. as far as where you could chanel you efforts- you would know that best given the situation– just off the top of my head- work with college police on strategies to crack down on fighting- and if a fight does occur to make the pentalies much harsher than they already are(which will hopefully make students and people think twice before acting like an animal)- but harsher pentalies ought to be instilled regardless of the outcome of the fight…because as you know and the country now realizes- that whether intentional or not- these fights can turn into something lethal. awareness can also be spread into students that they need to learn to help break up fights that they might witness, even if they only do have 20 seconds to respond; raise awareness and fundraising not only for your son but for all traumatic brain injuries nation wide, raise money and or develop support systems for children who have been abused, or ” ” for families with loved ones who need extra special care for their crippled/coma/brain dead/etc family members…. I aM not saying you should choose one of these options- as these were just some instant ideas that came to mind- but my point is, if i can think of these this quickly- i know for certain that there are indeed possibilities out there , and i also know for certain that you have enough motivation, desire, love, strength, and so many more traits that can most defiantly , without a doubt, make a change. you have already truly done wonders for the awareness of your sons tragedy, but there is always more. Im not sure if you a religious or not, but there is a saying that goes along the lines of “god gives tests only to people who can handle them” it hurt me to say that- but i truly want to believe that this is true. determine what that test is and how you handle them is completely up to you. as of now i have admired the way you have faced the test you have been given- but me , a perfect stranger am challenging you to make a difference- i believe if you channel you energy correctly that you certain can handle it. i have not seen this much love for a child in quite some time- and it is not only blowing me away but also tons of people spread throughout the US. what has also blown me away is kari’s sociology teacher who didn’t have to , but choose to rise to the occasion and fight for a cause that didn’t personally affect him, but rather a cause that did effect him in a way that he knew there was something he could do, and from the bottom of his heart her channeled his energy and made a difference- who would have thought one man- who did not know you son would have not only raised over 11,000$ but also made a positive impact on your daughter I believe that at some point in your life that you have the potential to do this same thing for an even larger cause!
if you have read this far- i please hope you take a few moments to reply anything that could possibly be on your mind- and i am not looking for a response similar to that of maureens response- because i can tell you that i honestly have no idea what you all have went through and i have not experienced anything even similarly close to that which you have
i truly wish your family the best of luck struggling through these hard times- i hope that you can find some good times with your family as well- despite the tragedy you are all forced to endure. you guys deserve it. When i return to college again in the fall- i wish to create some sort of fundraiser/awareness for ryansrally as i believe this is a cause worth fighting for. god bless you all- &may 2014 be a year for change!
Ken-
Firstly allow me to inform you of how sickening and upset the actions toward your son make me- after learning of what happened- I truly went sick to my stomach- which is not a normal occurrence. As I read into both sides of the story, however mainly on ryansrally, I found myself ranging through strong emotions that i have not experienced to that magnitude in quite some time. Emotions which made me angry, made me sad, led me to cry- and not just shed a tear, but truly cry- i have not cried in years. But what really led me to cry was reading and watching Kari’s input. I believe this story has truly touched me has to do with the fact that I am 21years old with a younger sister and attend a university similar to ryans- Pitt, a rival actually.
CAN YOU PLEASE-(when you have the time)-READ MY MESSAGE AS I HAVE PUT A LOT OF THOUGHT AND TIME INTO IT- ALSO: I WOULD BE VERY PLEASED TO GET SOME SORT OF RESPOSE- (obvisouly not nearly as long)- BUT ANY RESPONSE REGUARDING ANYTHING I MIGHT HAVE SAID WOULD TRULY MAKE MY DAY-i would very much like to hear any feedback on anything i mentioned- or possibly some of your own feedback that might shed light onto your situation -possibly dealing with something that i might not understand,etc
As you read my next paragraph please know that I am in no way shape or form doubting you and the tremendous effort that you as a loving parent have put in to this tragic situation- i honestly admire you for all of your efforts- your love for both your son and your family is not to be doubted by anyone. However, I do believe at some point later in life you will realize that it will not matter how long Ryans attackers are locked up. I hate to say it but there is nothing that they can do to change the past that will help to bring him back- excluding them following through with their 100,000$ and possibly , though high unlikely, contribute in other ways to help raise money for you son. My point is- to dwell on the punishment of your sons attackers will not help your son or your family in the long run. In my opinion, I understand ( though i do not mean i can relate nor understand what you have went through) but I do understand that you would like justice to be served not only for ryan but also for you and your family; however, the only way i could see justice truly being served is for both of his attackers to be put in the same spot that he is in currently. I guess I do have one curious and genuine question for you now that i have just brought that up- What do you believe their sentences should be? (i suppose that this answer has two parts- 1st what do you truly believe it should be- as if you were able to hand out their sentence & 2nd- realistically what do you think they should be given/ what are you striving for their punishments to be) Life in prison? Death Sentence? 10years , 20 years? community service? [I apologize if you have talked about this else on the site and i have missed it] If i were in your shoes I honestly would have no idea what i would think- mainly due to the fact that I can’t possibly fathom what you and your family are experiencing. From an outsiders perspective i still go back and forth in my head about what would be the right verdict. one part of my says they deserve “equal” sentencing as they “sentenced” ryan- life in prison. but the other part of me – being able to relate to young adults of this age living in this generation- realizes that these kids did not have the intention of inflicting the harm that they did upon ryan. Fights are common on college campuses, as I’m sure they always have been, and the majority of the fights often start over nothing- normally one comment is made- and then taken the wrong way- and then fight. It is sad. But it happens, as far as the kick to the head- that is something you would not expect on a college campus- but rather in the ghetto or third world countries.
Nonetheless, it already happened. You are not alone in the struggle you are going through- particular to your exact situation- yes you might be alone- but as far as parents feeling helpless over something that has happened to their child- you are not alone. A girl i grew up with was attending college in NYC, she was not a drug user, not a heavy drinker, and was not a “slutty/seductive dresser”, a bright student, nice to everybody she met- and everybody recognized her for that.; she was heading home one night after midnight- on her way to hop on the subway- the next thing everybody found out was that she was raped and then murdered and then her corpse was thrown down into the subway tunnel tracks. This female did nothing to provoke her attackers, did nothing to start a fight, but like your son all she could do was run from the danger she was in, and like your son she could not escape and as a result was victimized. now i know that in many ways this does not relate to your story- mainly because her parents (her father a well-loved public school teacher) did not have to sacrifice countless hours tending to her needs which i can’t imagine how tough that must be- well i sort of can as i had my grandfather who suffered from a massive stroke and was the closest you could get to a coma without being unconscious- a lot of the care falls along similar lines i would imagine, though not as intense as ryans- and no where near as saddening and f’d up as his situation- but going back to my point- her parents could defiantly relate to the fact that their first born child was a victim to a crime that was truly cruely unfair and a nightmare, a crime that took a child away from their family- ryan is “still” with you- but i can imagine the heartache it is to see him in that state. Honestly, I do not know which case wold be easier- still physically having your child around- even with the suffering- but still with a small chance of a miracle – or having your child buried and hanging on to only the good memories. I know with my grandfather- the later option is true- yet, these aren’t comparable cases. but as i mentioned her parents cannot relate to the demands and heartache of tending to a child in a coma- there certiantly are other parents who can relate- take for example, a child who was driving home and was hit by a belligerent drunk driver- in this case the attacker was also drunk and reckless just by stepping into the vehicle.
The reason i brought these up is that in my outsider opinion, is that after reading enough of your stories, i feel your sorrow, but i also feel a dire urge for justice “/revenge” to be had- it is almost as if a war has started- i do realize the stuff your having to deal with the other family- which after all that has happened truly isn’t fair and really drives the knife further into the wound- but rather than fight- i believe a change of heart and a change of where your exerting your energy could do you so good. I am not saying forgive them right away as to find peace- because unlike the amish- this would and will take tremendous time- but one thing is certain – you cannot hold on to this hatred(for lack of a better word) for the rest of your life- well you could- but it will not do you any good focusing your energy on the attackers. The law of attraction [please see wikipedia if you do nothing else in response to this message] is a perfect example that even if your thinking about them negatively about them- that the result will have to bring upon negative results – even if their subtle. for example, parts of me have to agree with the intentions of MAUREEN who messaged you on sept3 around 10am. However, in your response (correct me if Im wrong) but i sensed some sarcasm – sarcasm to a woman who not only said how sorry they are just like the other 1000’s of people, but cared enough to recognize your pain and offer some of the best advice that she could to help you work on progression(something that will have to happen over time)- and she then provided you with examples (which she was not trying to say that they were similar situations) but she provided them as an example of how your actions and ways of thinking can effect your outlook on a situation- but much more importantly, your personal well being.
This Secction Is Extremely Oppinionated and does not reflect what i think about you , your character , or your families situation..please read the rest of the message:
{{the sarcasm i saw in your response i can also sense in some of your writing- which i take to be caused by frustration amount many other things- but i want to let you know that literally everyone out there who is aware of this incident feels deeply sorry for you and can’t imagine what you are going though- which is why a consistent mature response- trying to keep emotion to a minimum (and I’m not talking about love and personal emotion towards your family and the passage you may write concerning how your family has coped with this- but i am referring to the emotion dealing with the legal stuff-both in court And Online(like the paragraphs above)- sarcasm and be-raiding the attacker and his parents does no good for you- however, there are other methods to still get the same points across that your trying to bring to attention to, (now please do not taking this the wrong way- i am just trying to inform you the way people reading your response might intepreate your attitude – even though none of us have any idea and can’t even imagine walking a minute in your shoes) buy anyways I’m going to say it anyways and if you don’t like my oppion- please continue to read- because this is the only point at which i point out anything of this manner- the rest is positive so here it is..additionally, being sarcastic to the woman MAUREEN ,whether its true or not, appears as if you did not even consider her option with an open mind but rather played the game- “oh really? you had a bad situation? well it doesn’t stack up with mine so your advice is not something i want to hear”]}}
going back to”the amish was to serve as an example as to how your outlook can effect your well being”.. regarding loosing their loved ones-The amish community suffered just as much as you did- they expericed a massacre that was indeed intentional by the attacker- and in my opinion the point of that was not to tell you that you need to make amends and forgive them this moment and move on accordingly, but rather to illustrate how they were able to remain with as much peace as they possibly could after such a horrific tragedy. They were able to keep their thoughts positive and that showed as a result in the way they channeled their energy positively just take a second and think about it- what good would it have done for them to dwell on the justice of their attacker(regardless of his sentence)- how would it have helped them at all? In your case- rather than expel your energy online against fighting for your sons case and bringing down the men who did this to them- i believe that your effort could better be channeled into preventing acts like this to occur in the further – which don’t get me wrong- i believe you have already done that, and done it well, but i believe there is more to be done- the awareness can always grow-[take mothers against drunk drivers as an example, I’m sure all of them would have liked justice served and their childs killer or crippler to not be able to live a good life and have to suffer the consequences- but instead they channeled their efforts into preventing future attacks and raising awareness- consequently their actions based off the single loss of their child has served to save hundreds if not thousands of other children at risk- anything is possible if you put your mind to it- any one can make an impact- your son ryan can not only serve as a adult helping to further advancements in brain injures but also advancements in cracking down on fighting and abuse by other human beings- as i read in another comment(not me saying this, though it is logical- yet devastating)- being in the state he is- he has a chance to effect and change more lives than he could of if the attack never happened] anyways my point is things can be done to prevent future trajedies- and you are in a great position to lead this fight and thus possibly giving you a great purpose in your life beyond the duties as a father and loving parent- i just do not want you to suffer while having your energy focused on your sons attacks(and do not take this the wrong way- i know the majority of your energy is not being spent on these two men- but my point is none of your energy should be spent on them as it will not do you any good in the long run, think about how you want to be remembered after you are dead and gone ; as wells ryan- you do not want to be remembered as the man who fought desperately (for lack of a better word) agaist you sons attacks- trying to bring a false justice and attention to the horrible human beings that they are-you have much more potential- and though your actions so does ryan- more potential to “live forever” in memory more so than he already has and will. as far as where you could chanel you efforts- you would know that best given the situation– just off the top of my head- work with college police on strategies to crack down on fighting- and if a fight does occur to make the pentalies much harsher than they already are(which will hopefully make students and people think twice before acting like an animal)- but harsher pentalies ought to be instilled regardless of the outcome of the fight…because as you know and the country now realizes- that whether intentional or not- these fights can turn into something lethal. awareness can also be spread into students that they need to learn to help break up fights that they might witness, even if they only do have 20 seconds to respond; raise awareness and fundraising not only for your son but for all traumatic brain injuries nation wide, raise money and or develop support systems for children who have been abused, or ” ” for families with loved ones who need extra special care for their crippled/coma/brain dead/etc family members…. I aM not saying you should choose one of these options- as these were just some instant ideas that came to mind- but my point is, if i can think of these this quickly- i know for certain that there are indeed possibilities out there , and i also know for certain that you have enough motivation, desire, love, strength, and so many more traits that can most defiantly , without a doubt, make a change. you have already truly done wonders for the awareness of your sons tragedy, but there is always more. Im not sure if you a religious or not, but there is a saying that goes along the lines of “god gives tests only to people who can handle them” it hurt me to say that- but i truly want to believe that this is true. determine what that test is and how you handle them is completely up to you. as of now i have admired the way you have faced the test you have been given- but me , a perfect stranger am challenging you to make a difference- i believe if you channel you energy correctly that you certain can handle it. i have not seen this much love for a child in quite some time- and it is not only blowing me away but also tons of people spread throughout the US. what has also blown me away is kari’s sociology teacher who didn’t have to , but choose to rise to the occasion and fight for a cause that didn’t personally affect him, but rather a cause that did effect him in a way that he knew there was something he could do, and from the bottom of his heart her channeled his energy and made a difference- who would have thought one man- who did not know you son would have not only raised over 11,000$ but also made a positive impact on your daughter I believe that at some point in your life that you have the potential to do this same thing for an even larger cause!
if you have read this far- i please hope you take a few moments to reply anything that could possibly be on your mind- and i am not looking for a response similar to that of maureens response- because i can tell you that i honestly have no idea what you all have went through and i have not experienced anything even similarly close to that which you have
i truly wish your family the best of luck struggling through these hard times- i hope that you can find some good times with your family as well- despite the tragedy you are all forced to endure. you guys deserve it. When i return to college again in the fall- i wish to create some sort of fundraiser/awareness for ryansrally as i believe this is a cause worth fighting for. god bless you all- &may 2014 be a year for change!
It’s really a pathetic state of affairs how some people (the Vantreases) can live their lives “asleep-at-the-wheel” with no awareness of reality or consequences. I’ll never understand it. I don’t know if people like that truly are blind and ignorant or just don’t care and live their lives for their own selfish “means to an end.” It’s terrible how they have conducted themselves, and continue to conduct themselves. If one of my sons did what their son did, I would have to tell him to own up to it, try somehow to make reparations as best they can (not that you can ever truly do that) and live with the sad consequences. I pray that I am raising them to live a life of love and compassion so that they don’t find themselves behaving in such a neglectful and violent manner. I’m truly sorry for what has happened to Ryan’s precious life, and to yours. It’s your lives that have also been changed forever. xoxo
I am sorry I just read your story I feel that he should stay in prison for the rest of his life the justice system is a big joke my ex husband shot me I lost my leg he has been incarcerated since 2003 it is now 2013 he was sentenced 28 years he has to serve 15 years then he will pre release from present I have to live with an artificial lamb for the rest of my lifeI will never be able to work just as your son they have took something away from usI would love to write a letter to the parole board on your behalf
I have an older brother, and I could not believe the stuff that the other people are saying and I respect all of you for what you guys are doing for your son. I’m on your side. I will pray not only for your son but I will pray that on that Monday the judge and the jury will make the right decision and keep that violent boy in jail for the time that is sentenced to him. That boy doesn’t deserve to walk out and see freedom. I pray that the judge and the jury put themselves in you and your families shoes, that they feel what you and your family feel, that they see the pain that the boy has caused you, and most of all, I pray that your son wakes up, I pray he walks out of that hospital, I pray he gets to see the sun, hear the birds and gets to hug all of you. Be strong. I pray you guys stay strong for your son.
The Vantrease family needs to realize that their son made a HUGE mistake. Do they not realize how the justice system works? You do the crime you do the time. Don’t we learn in Kindergarten to keep our hands, feet and objects to ourselves? Guess he missed that lesson. Ryan’s life has been put on hold because of a violent action. What ever happened to remorse and repenting for our sins? I think this family needs to read the Bible and get some God in their lives. At least they can read it…Ryan on the other hand will have to work hard to be able to do this again. Lots of Love and Prayers to Ryan and his family.
Wow. If my child had done what hers did I would be on my knees begging for your forgiveness. I would be at your home every day to see if there was ANYTHING I could do to help you. Parents need to start letting their children be accountable for their actions.
I think the Vantrease family needs to see what just one day for your family consists of. You know she could have went about this in a better way. She could have maybe asked if there were anything that her son and family could do to help.
Your site is uplifting. It’s a belief that We Shall Overcome! That a family can ban together and do amazing things!
Your all attacking Maureen when her intentions were to help not hinder in any way if you know what forgiveness is then you would know that forgiving someone takes nothing away from you it sets you free it doesn’t mean you forget your taking their power away by not suffering from the pain they inflicted you forgive for yourself my prayers are with both families that God help you through and I pray he will heal your son back to full health because I believe in miracles and you should too this world would be a much better place if we were supporting one another instead of attacking them for taking their words the wrong way
I read “Maureen” twice, cannot beleive what I am reading. It is obvious to me that this woman has obviously been kicked in the head and is still able to barely function. This person can’t be real, I think she is just pulling our legs….Nobody can be this stupid to make comments like that.
Ken ,I don’t understand why this woman even wrote.She can believe what she wants but she has no right telling you how to feel or what to do.There are so many ,many people who are here for you all and Ryan and we don’t need someone like her.I don’t care what she’s been through ,let her feel what she wants but leave you alone .You have EVERY right to all your feelings and we are forever with You ,Sue, Ryan and Kari…. Love Gail
At least this “peach” will continue to rot in prison. 😉
Ken, I would never hold back, especially to this family that doesn’t get it. You’re a better man because if it were one of my family members….. Yeah, I’m a very revengeful person. Hopefully someday this woman and her family will be on the other side(the victim). Instead of traveling to see her son, they should be traveling to help Ryan out in any way they could. And you’re right about this type of crime should be punished as if the victim had died. Glad to see WV parole board stand up against these low lifers from deleware.
I am mother, wife, sister, and daughter. I know what it is to experience tragedy in life. I do not support Gail Vantrease, or Austin Vantrease for that matter. I just feel sad that this amount of anger has to continue. I think of the Amish women whose little daughters were gunned down by a man who tied them up and then shot them. By the end of the week they were embracing the widow of the killer and wishing her well. They know about the healing power of forgiveness. I, too, have learned that one cannot heal without forgiveness. As the concentration camp survivor said about it, “If I did not forgive the Nazis, I would still be their prisoner”. I am just worried about Mr. Diviney remaining a victim. I never meant to demean his suffering and I think I have a good idea what he is going through, based on my own life. As one who is more detached from his situation, I was merely offering a way to help him on the road to recovery.
Would you mind sharing your experience since you feel you have a good idea of what I’m going through? You’d be the first having this complete knowledge. A few questions:
Was the “tragedy” brutally inflicted on your child? Were they defenseless when this happened?
If you answer “yes” to both of these, then please continue by providing the details. How can I verify this? Feel free to email me if you wish.
Also, would you expand on the Amish story, as I can’t reconcile how it relates (and I believe I understand it well, but perhaps you have inside information). Did the attacker’s family also repeatedly threaten the Amish victim’s family? Did they blame the victim for the attacker’s actions?
No need to speak to the Nazi comparison. Unless you somehow see a government’s persecution of a group as applicable. I’m guessing there’s more than a few jewish prisoners who hold their captures accountable to this day. Do they forgive them? Maybe… but that’s up to them as victims. Which brings me to my next point…
I am not the victim of the attack. I never thought of myself as such. Even in my statement to the Parole Board (see Part 2 of this series of posts) I made no mention of the impact on my life. Ryan is the only victim. Please, don’t say or suggest otherwise. Forgiveness is not mine to give. I think what you’re suggesting is that I excuse, and this will never happen. Life changing actions, to me, have lifetime consequences and accountability. That’s a principle I will never waiver from, without compromise. It’s up to Ryan to forgive, but he is unable at this time. I am not vindictive — although I reserve the possibility to be.
Ken: I submit that one doesn’t need to have complete knowledge of what you’re going through to have some insight into what it’s doing to you. The fury and grief some through loud and clear — and I believe Maureen’s reacting to that. She’s not a Vantrease apologist; she simply holds the position that finding some measure of forgiveness would benefit you.
To me, the question is not whether or not her position is correct; since forgiveness brings with it a measure of peace, her position is correct almost by definition. The question is, How in the world are you supposed to reach that point? I don’t know the answer, but I’m pretty sure it’s not by having random people on the internet, like me, telling you what to think and feel. Saying you should “let it go” isn’t wrong, exactly, it’s just incomplete and therefore trite.
Inherent in all of this is the idea that, by shouldering the fallout of the vicious attack on Ryan, you are, indeed, a victim of sorts, and you do have the moral authority to extend forgiveness (or not). I understand your point that Ryan is the only victim and only he can forgive. I respectfully disagree. But we don’t need to see eye to eye on this. I will continue to support you in whatever ways I can.
@maureen… Why make it 2? Okay today Austin likely has done a few things. Gotten up, walked around, looked around, taken a shower, eaten 3 meals… Chewing his own food. Worked out, gone to the restroom, watched television, gone outside, written his parents a letter or perhaps talked to them on the phone, stretched or readjusted his own body if achy or uncomfortable and even had the opportunity to apologize and even consider applying for a prison job to start to begin to contribute to the care of a precious young man whom he chose to “punt his head, as if it were a football”. Incidentally, this is a quote from someone who used to be Austin’s friend during the trial.
Do you get that Ryan hasn’t done any of those things for almost two years and 9 mos??? Did you read enough to know that they have had to have Ryan’s eyes sewn shut… Twice to save his eyes in the last month? Perhaps you might be a touch irked if you were feeding your son, fighting for his life..hourly, brushing his teeth, changing his catheter, changing his diaper, showering him, brushing his teeth 10 or more times a day? Have you given up your wonderful job to try to save your child? Have you missed your daughters high school prom and graduation because to leave your son’s side might mean you come back to a crisis? Do you ache all day from the physical strain of what you need to do to keep your child in the best physical shape to alleviate his pain? How far in debt are you from constantly mounting medical bills? What have YOU done to ease the Diviney’s burden other than write a thoughtless stupid post?
In 2015, Austin will likely be a free man. Will Ryan? Will Ken, Sue or Kari?
Will Austin get a chance to graduate? Play sports? Work? The Diviney’s would be grateful for even a hello for their child. Ken might be angry but those that know him also know that he loves to the bottom of his heart. Ask Kari if she feels any doubt about that.
Maybe you should really try to step in their shoes. I’d be madder than hell. I personally will NEVER forgive them and I hope Austin wakes up with nightmares every night of his life. But he won’t. His only nightmares come from his own self centered-ness. If you had done this to another human could you live with yourself and never apologize? Did your Mom never make you accountable for your actions? Clearly Austin’s did not.
You want compassion for the Vantrease’s? Maybe forgiveness even? The only person that can give forgiveness is Ryan. Oh, I forgot. Austin took that ability away from him too.
Austin should get on his hands and knees every morning and every night that Ken is just angry and not truly vindictive.
Seriously, you are absurd.
Right on!!!
Absolutely–all these angry responses to a beyond insensitive post are right on. I can’t even find further words to contribute, but agree with all those who wrote and those who think the same way and didn’t write. We love you Divineys, always. maureen…shame on you.
Love Ryan now and always and prayers for his and your safekeeping,during this recovery, Team Diviney. Annie
“just get over it”. Are you freaking kidding me?? How do you get over the loss of the child you once had? Had do you get over never hearing their laugh or voice anymore? How do you get over never being able to enjoy life anymore? I have been accused by my own sister as being angry about my own daughter suffering a brain injury about a year and a half ago…no one caused this to happen for us but if they had…. The only thing I would be getting over is their head with the wheels of my car……just sayin!!!!
I think Maureen Turman and Gail Vantrease are just so full of anger at Austin that they take it out on the Diviney’s. Sad but true and they will never heal as a result.
I do like the suggestion’s that Gail’s family take up some donation’s for the care of Ryan which may teach her son Austin some responsiblity for his actions and prepare him for when he gets released and finds his first employment then see’s the automatic deduction in his weekly salary for the support of Ryan.
I also hope that Maureen and Gail understand that this parole hearing is just one of many and that we Ryan’s wider family will all be with him again.
I also wonder where is Austin’s Dad in all of this.
I can’t imagine the pain you’re going through. I have two grown healthy sons whom I love dearly. I pray for your family. This criminal will have to answer to God for his actions. Hope he gets life in prison…
I admire you and your family EVERYDAY! I don’t have the words to say how much I respect you and your family for all you guys do for Ryan. Our prayers are always with you guys! I read all your blogs and just wish more people in the world were so compassionate and loving as your family!
First of all Ken – thank you for sharing your three recent posts. I am now glad that you made us all wait by breaking your news into several posts because, honestly, I don’t think we all would have been able to handle all that in just one post.
But now I’m pissed off. And to all readers, this is my opinion!
I have had many things keep me awake this week but hearing all the news really has me going. I have been upset about this whole thing before but I don’t think I have truly gotten as angry about it as after reading your posts.
So I have several questions like what is the role of the dad in this whole thing? We hear all the stuff about that jack wad of a mother Gale. Does she rule the roost at home?
Regardless of how a person is raised, they should take responsibility for their actions. What person doesn’t know that it isn’t right to kick a man when he’s down?? I can’t help but question Austin’s upbringing and the blatant lack of parenting skills his parents bestowed upon him. Don’t get me started on Austin’s choice of “friends.”
And really Gale being upset about this site? This site has helped Ryan get numerous supplies and donations toward his constant care. The Vantrease family has DONE NOTHING to help! The family doesn’t care. Austin doesn’t care. They are not even showing an effort. Austin “can’t” pay restitution while in prison? Then YOU help, Gale!! Take responsibility for your son and his actions! Be a parent! Teach him what it means to be responsible!
And why should Austin Vantease NOT be treated like a murderer?? After all Ken – didn’t you say Ryan was brought back to life on at least one occasion? This means he did die, right? If not for God’s and Ryan’s wills and the great teamwork of the hospital staff, Ryan would not be here. VANTREASE IS A MURDERER! Right? Ryan is still here, constantly reminding us all of the injustice that has been committed.
Hearing all the news (okay, news and opinions) really gives me more ammo to write more letters to the parole board. And I hope it does the same for your readers. Keep Ryan relevant!!
Meg, I see you are a member of the MOTNC, Middle of the Night Club! You made some great points here in your post! We will never make sense of any of the Vantreases! Never!
Excuse me. Actually will be three years very soon.
I beleive a stronger hand should have been taken to Austin in his younger years. Maybe he wouldn’t have grown into the violent person he was two years ago that November night.
Ken,Hard to believe this person said the things she did, Like her son,she feels restitution isn’t due! It’s understandable why he’s like he is : Changes incident,blames everyone else,feels sorry for Ryan and family,REALLY..Feels sorry for long ride and being put out
And what is wrong with “maureen”( You,re vindictive) is absolutely a lie
All you want, Ken, is to keep Ryan relevant and writing updates for all those who care and love Ryan. LET IT GO ,is she crazy too. This can’t and never should happen Maybe easy for them all to let it go, what have they lost?
Here always Ken and one day we will find Ryan again Love gail
Maureen: I know it’s sometimes hard to read Ken’s posts, because his anger is fierce and palpable. Sometimes I, too, want to turn away. But he’s not vindictive; he’s not seeking revenge; he’s seeking justice.
Holy crap.
Exactly.
If the Vantrease family feels so bad, Why don’t they start making payments to support Ryans care and their son can repay them and continue with the payments when he is released.
Maureen: You have tried 3 times to get yourself off of this newsletter? What does that mean? Just quit logging on and everyone will be happier for it. By the way, Gail is probably lonesome in “La La Land.” Why don’t you join her?
Great parenting job you have done, Gail Vantrease! Wow, the apple doesnt fall far from the tree. I hope Austin spends the rest of his life with obsessive thoughts of what he has done. Thoughts he cant shut off.
Maureen,
People like you who want Ken to “let it go” should really go to the Diviney home and see Ryan in person. I doubt you would last one hour in the room with him. Thanks to Austin two families are already ruined, not sure which one you think is not. Ken has not shown the vindictivness that others would have, he instead is using this website to release his anger through words. Austin is lucky to be alive, there are many fathers who would have hunted him down and killed him for what he did to Ryan if it were their son, he is lucky to have made it to prison.
Amen Anna!
I rarely post on here even though I read this blog almost daily. However, I can guarantee that I can speak now because I can hopefully provide you some insight, Maureen. My daughter, like Ryan, has brain injury inflicted upon her by others almost 10 years ago. Ten years is a long time to visualize what your world once was and what it has become. It’s hard to forgive people who injure others and are free to go on with their lives without a second glance, where you become an inconvenience to them about something they caused but want to push under the carpet. My life and that of my family is suspended in time albeit a living hell. My daughter as I knew her, a beautiful, vibrant 20 year old who had the world at her fingertips is now in a world of her own, but not of her making. The days turn into weeks, months, years and we seem stuck in a time warp through no fault of our or her own. Forget making plans. It’s a hour to hour maybe a day to day plan. Things change in a heartbeat. Forget holidays…where’s the joy?? Vacations are guilt trips so forget them. You wonder the entire time if she is alright and feel guilty that you are somewhere and she is stuck somewhere else.
Meanwhile, the people that caused your heartache are also moving on. They are healthy and barely think about the damage they caused. If they are in jail, they have a chance to get out and move past the past. They aren’t suspended in a time warp like he Divineys and my family are. I don’t jump at the chance to put my story out there because I need to conserve my energy to focus on my daughter. To say it is overwhelming is putting it lightly. I have the right to reserve judgment on the people who did this to my daughter just as the Divineys do. This blog is a release mechanism for Mr Diviney and he has the right to be mad, angry and whatever else he wants. These are his true feelings. Please note I have said this many times over the past almost 10 years you have no idea until you have actually lived this for a few years.
I don’t know how to have compassion or forgiveness for those that hurt my daughter. They even admitted it in court but did not want to pay restitution. Even after they relented and paid up, they still viewed things in their own warped way. We were told it was our fault that it happened. See even if you have compassion, these idiots somehow in their own mind think they were in the right and that somehow the victim was asking for it. Trust me I know this.
My suggestion to you is to stay off this site and direct your energies elsewhere. You have no idea what a living hell is. The Divineys and my family …well we do.
ALLTID kjekt med bursdag! Du hadde en superfin øienelksts. BS skjerf er en hit i dette huset ogsÃ¥. VÃ¥ger ikke si hvor mange jeg har….. Kos deg
Anna makes a good point–Dr Gupta/Nancy Grace…….why not? I love Ryan forever–all i can do is donate as i am able and pray (my mentioning praying, Ken, is not meant to upset you, it is just what i do). You guys get to do all the ‘heavy lifting’ and my prayers include your being renewed each day to do the care that Ryan needs. I pray for his healing however long it takes. Love to Ryan, you, Ken, Sue and kari, forever, Annie xoxoxox to Ryan, please:)
I agree! Nancy Grace, and it’s about time (or past) for an update on NBC’s Today as well as NBC Washington. Ryan’s continuing story as told by his dad should continue for everyone to stay up-to-date, not just us here at Ryan’s Rally. I will help in whatever needs to be done to accomplish this. I am at your service.
@Maureen, Seriously? How can you even make such a statement to the Diviney family. What compassion have the Vantrease’s shown for Ryan and his family? Austin can’t pay back in a million years what he willingly and vindictively did to Ryan. Furthermore, SHAME ON YOU for your obviously clueless and extremely callous “let it go” statement. I’m sure Ken would love to hear his son speak and be able to look into his eyes once again so he could “let it go”. Because of the vicious,thug-like and lack of respect for human life behavior from Austin Vantrease, the Diviney’s can’t ever get on with their lives. As Ryan can’t either. There’s a big difference between bearing a human being and a monster such as the Vantrease’s have. Shame on you for defending them. I pray you never have to endure a small microsecond of pain that Ryan and his family have.
Wow!!! Ya know, Gale, why don’t you stop blaming others and take responsibility for once in your life? Show some compassion, if you have any, and maybe hold a fund raiser for Ryan. Be proactive instead of reactive! It sure would go a long way in healing a lot of hearts.
Or you could stick with your current M.O.: Since I ain’t got game, I transfer blame!
I feel a lot of sorrow for you, Mr. Diviney and I would not want to be in your position in a million years, but you are so vindictive! These Vantreases are people with a child that they bore, raised, and love as you do your children. Have some compassion for them please! I feel sad for both sides of this. Austin could never pay you back for what he did to your son, but you really need to let it go. I have tried 3 times to get myself off of this newsletter, because you just spout anger and hatred and that gets you no where in terms of getting on with your life. I believe it is hurting you and your family to keep seeking revenge for this crime. One family is ruined by this, why make it two.
It already is two, Maureen? Actually more than two!!! See, there’s that narcissism creeping back. “our family is already ruined by this, why make it two?” Seems there are SEVERAL families involved. May’s, AVTs, all the other thugs who surrounded Ryan and Brian, and cowardly scampered away after the damage was done. Why make it two? ====>heads to the bathroom to be physically ill.
Ryan’s and his roommate’s families were inadvertantly left out of my post. They deserve TOP billing as families being affected by this attack.
Who are you, Maureen?? You obviously are CLUELESS! This is not a subscription service website. People go here willingly to keep up to date on Ryan and to HELP him. Why don’t you sign up to give on a monthly basis to help Ryan with his needs? That would be a good place to start.
Also, believe it when they say it. This is not about revenge, rather JUSTICE!
&#Cni0;lavoro…83ao!2on ho mai pensato alla francia come meta per la professione…e non so dire molte parole in francese, però dai tuoi racconti sembra interessante….ti leggerò e chissà che prima o poi….Il mio sogno londinese in questo momento è difficile da realizzare vista la crisi, quindi potrebbe essere ilmomento di aprire nuove strade.in bocca al lupo!
Maureen…
How could you? Who raised you? How can you tell a man who is living his life and fighting for his sons EVERY day that he needs to be compassionate? HOW? You are clearly not of the stock that Ryan Diviney was made of. This family is passionate. This family is loyal. And this family deserves justice. They are not mean or bad people. They are holding on with every fiber of their being fighting for justice. Justice for them? No. Justice for Ryan. Their heart. You clearly do not know who they are. And I hope you don’t have kids or even a sibling. If you do, picture them in the situation that our amazing Ryan is in. Maybe look at it from that perspective. Of COURSE you would be angry. Something would be wrong if you weren’t. And how is Ken supposed to ‘get on’ with his life when his life, and the life of his family has been flipped upside down? Life as they know it is over and has been for a while. They are living day to day. Minute to minute. Not knowing what disaster might come next. Practice what you preach and be compassionate towards them. No part of the vantrease family deserves compassion. If it were one of my brothers who had done this (which they NEVER would, because they were raised right) I could not and WOULD not stand by and support them. What it truly boils down to is that Austin is a horrible human being with no morals. Morals are instilled in us from whoever raised us. He is a product of his environment. I support the Diviney family and every one of their emotions. Even if they hate the Vantrease family. Who are you to tell them how to feel? Back off. You’re challenging an army of Diviney supporters.
Very well stated Ann. I have 2 sons that I love very much, also. But if one of them did this to another human being I could not stand by them.
Susan
Maureen Terman, your opinion wreaks of insensitivity and complete ignorance. Are you even human? Maybe someone should beat you into a coma, and when you have NO ONE (as I’m guessing you are impossible to love — it is nearly impossible to love a loose-lipped ignoramus) defending your innocence and fighting to keep your offenders where they belong (though I personally feel Ryan’s offenders belong in a much worse place than prison–namely, Hell), maybe then you will feel differently about this website. Maybe then it will be clear to you that no one deserves to go through the pain and tragedy Ryan, his family, and his friends have, and if there is anything that can lessen that pain even the slightest bit, something like maintaining an informational website raising awareness and keeping a spotlight on a criminal until some kind of real justice is served, then those people have every right in the world to do so. No one is holding you down and forcing you to read this website, you choose to read it. If you don’t like what you read, find yourself to another website, preferably one that teaches you how to hold your tongue when your ignorant opinions are unwarranted and unwelcome.
-WVU alum rallying for Ryan
Well you don’t need a PHD in Psychology to know how PB viewed her statement. I suspect that PB’s have heard it all and are very intuitive to these type of statements from parents, friends of convicts…meaning-it helps put puzzle together. They see where all the aggression, ‘I’m the victim mentality’ , ‘it was just a fight’, or (the real zinger) ‘it was just a reaction’ comes from. What you’ve shared makes me angry on a different level-that his sentence should have been much much longer. He’s a murderer. He feels no remorse. I suspect the only conversation he has with himself is something like this, ‘why did i go to wvu that weekend?’ instead of ‘what the f*&% is wrong with me that I would kick someone in the head?’ Like I mentioned in a previous post, I wish him nothing but ill will while in prison. I hope the “peach” continues his incarceration career getting written up.
Gail Vantrease made herself out to be even more selfish and disgusting than thought of before. I bet the parole board was having a good laugh at her when the hearing was over….Why is she talking about Ocean City events, disputing ONE fight? Gail, you are in the hills of WV honey, they go to Deep Creek Lake, Cheat Lake, and the Great Lakes, they don’t drive to Ocean City. They are working, hard working folks, coal miners, farmers, doctors, nurses… who live in WV, 15 hour day is nothing to them. Those men probably left that hearing and went to their second job.
Gail, if Sue was using her influence, Dr Sanjay Gupta would be all over this story. Do you know who he is? What about Nancy Grace? have you seen this story on her show? You want to talk influence, just let Sue loose.
No wonder Austin is the way he is. Gail is all about HERSELF! (Even the daughter wrote once on her website how SHE took care of Austin when he was growing up.) Gail needs to stop looking in her distorted mirror, tell Austin to be a “peach” and get a JOB in prison so he can start acting like a man and be accountable for his restitution. Speaking of a man, why didn’t Bob Vantrease stand up and speak for his son?
Ken when you release your book it’s going to be a best seller, under non-fictional humor! God, you are funny!
I’m with Andrew…… and I’m always with Ryan. Love you all!!!!
This makes me sick to my stomach
Ken so sorry you have little relief. I still thinking of Ryan often and his beautiful smile. Mrs D
Wow! Really? What a slap in the face that must have felt like. If there is any comfort in any of this, it is the fact that you have shown what true parenting is … to do everything you can to make sure your children grow up healthy and treating others with kindness and respect at whatever cost to yourselves. We would not know any of the sacrifices you and your family have had to make if it weren’t for the fact that you are trying to draw attention to Ryan and his care. I am praying for strength and favor where it is needed and that you will continue to show the Vantreases what true family is about.