Today is my wedding anniversary. Sue and I have been at it for twenty-six years now. I’m not exactly sure how I got so lucky. Honestly, I don’t entirely know why she keeps me around. I suppose she wonders why I just keep hanging around. Like our twenty-fifth anniversary last year, I can tell you everything about the day. But, would you believe I remember very little? Let me explain.
This year, like last, is filled with routine. Like clockwork, we go through our days with a predefined precision akin to a nuclear clock… right down to the second.
There are no special anniversary dinners.
No date night.
No privacy.
No intimacy.
No gifts.
No cards.
It’s just another day in thirty-two months of days since Ryan was senselessly beaten. Like every other aspect of our lives, it goes to the back-burner to simmer until there’s a time when we can hopefully be normal again.
We couldn’t help smashing the cake in each other’s face. A sign of things to come.
Now, before some people start telling us we must make time for ourselves I’ll just stop them right here. Those who feel this way just have no idea of what we are dealing with. It’s relentlessly being put through the wringer. As parents, we all put are children first. When they need our help, we sacrifice as much as is necessary. Just consider Sue and I proof of this. When we decided to become parents almost twenty-two years ago, we didn’t put any conditions on it. With open-eyes we knew the children shifted our focus from us before we even tried to conceive them. This hasn’t changed. It never will.
We agreed we’d be there for them when they needed us. Ryan needs us. Every second of every minute he needs us and we won’t leave him. He has our loyalty. One of us will always be at his side to make sure he is loved and cared for in the best possible way. Like any other (good) parent, we just want him to have the best life he can and right now we are it.
Note: I did do my best to make a nice dinner. It’s the least I can do with all Sue puts up with in me. I put a roast on the outdoor grill earlier in the day and it has slow-cooked since. I’ll whip up a vegetable side and something for the ole’ sweet tooth.
Happy Anniversary, “yinz” guys! I still can’t believe it’s been 26 years. Holy crap are we OLD!!!!
Happy anniversary Ken and Sue!
Happy belated anniversary. You are Sue are a testament to love and devotion to each other and to the family that your love created.
Now please let me be just a little bit mom-ish. You said: “Now, before some people start telling us we must make time for ourselves I’ll just stop them right here. Those who feel this way just have no idea of what we are dealing with.” Not true. I have a very good idea of what you’re dealing with. And it’s from that perspective that I say that the two of you need to make time for yourselves — even if it’s just wee small bits of time. I’m not saying to prioritize yourselves over Ryan. I’m saying that making time for yourselves so that you can regenerate as individuals and tend the intimate relationship that resulted in Ryan (and Kerry) is another aspect of prioritizing Ryan (and Kerry).
Personally, nearly two years after my father died, and 16 months after my mother passed, I’m still healing from all the years of care-giving. The exhaustion goes that deep.
Hope the anniversary dinner was good. Nothing beats slow cooking on the grill. Congrats on 26 years together, a long marriage is not for the weak. Stay strong Divineys! We are here.
Happy Anniversary, you two Lovebirds. God bless you both. The only thing better than where you are right now, would be when Ryan recovers to the extent he will recover to (I’m hoping and praying this recovery will be far more than you can even imagine…..).Love, SH SP, NGA, Annie
God Bless you Ken and Sue. Happy Anniversary to the both of you.
Happy anniversary to you and Sue.
Sending lots of love from all the Os.
p.s. do tell how you slow-cooked a roast on the grill, sounds delish.
Soak the roast in brine for 4 hours.
If you use a rub (like I do), put it on the roast now.
Sear all the outside edges on high heat.
Turn down the temperature to low (say, 225 degrees).
Place the roast on the grill’s warming rack, fatty side up.
Place the brine solution (used before) directly below the roast.
Tent it all with aluminum foil
Cook for at least 4 – 5 hours.
Happy Anniversary to one of our favorite and most admired couples in the world! Much love and best wishes for many more from Stew and Jo.
O.K., I will try not to bug you, just as long as you get a little time away — each of you, albeit it one at a time.
You are always on my mind. Always here with love and prayers.
In a world where quickie marriages and quickie divorces are common, you and wife have really lived up to what marriage vows are all about, and then some.
You are very admirable and Sue is as lucky to have you as you are to have her. And Ryan is blessed to have you both. Try and enjoy your evening. Happy Anniversary~
How very beautiful, Ken.
She walks in beauty,
Like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes.
~ by Byron
Congratulations on your anniversary Ken & Sue! You are both an inspiration to myself and so many others
Long may you love…
Always,
Paula
Even though it doesn’t feel like a “happy anniversary”, congratulations on your 26 years together — and still going strong. Stronger than ever. Stronger than you ever thought possible or imagined necessary. Yes, you are a lucky man to have Sue. And she’s lucky to have you, but I don’t think luck has anything to do with it. You are each a gift from God to the other and to your children. What an amazing family you are, a blessing and inspiration to so many. Keep doing what you’re doing. You and Sue are the perfect parents for Ryan and Kari. What a team… and all of Team Diviney loves you! Hugs and prayers always <3
Happy Anniversity to 2 very special people.
Ken ,Enjoy your anniversary dinner,Sounds delicious! All my best wishes for all .You both are truly the “best” in every way Love Gail
Congrats, Ken and Sue!
Happy Anniversary to two very special people!
sending love to you both.
Dinner at Chez Ken. LOL.
Beautifully stated Ken. Happy Anniversary Ken & Sue! Much love, Peggie