I know I was told, at least twice, that this past weekend was Easter. For whatever reason, it just didn’t register in my mind. Lat’s face it, holidays just don’t matter to me anymore, especially those tied to a faith that I gave up on some time back. On Saturday morning is when it hit me because I began getting excited about Kari coming home from WVU (she’s leaving this morning).
I’m not sure what prompted me but I checked the nurse’s schedule to see who was on that night. Saturday’s are inconsistent with the nurse assigned. We don’t have a steady one, but the agency is (generally) good about getting it covered. We have one regular nurse who always takes at least two of these a month (and usually three), leaving just one or two needing picked-up. I was happy to see we had a nurse coming in. Sure, she wasn’t a regular but she knew Ryan and it wouldn’t take much to get her up to speed.
Then I looked at Sunday. It was blank. The nurse who works this shift wasn’t coming in. It was Easter and she has never really worked a holiday yet, so I shouldn’t have relied on her to cover this shift (her shift, by the way). Thank goodness we have the other regular nurse who does whatever she can to help us out (even coming in at midnight on Christmas and New Year’s Eve). My oblivion that it was a holiday bit me in the ass. I should have been more aware, because now it’s too late. We’re screwed. There was no hope that it would get covered this late in the game and I never got a call from the nursing agency as a heads-up.
As I write this it’s four o’clock in the morning and I’m tired. The kind of tired where a guy doesn’t see straight. A tired where everything is annoying. I’m so tired my nerves are hypersensitive… I itch everywhere. I’m downright irritable. I dread plodding through the day ahead. It’ll be a rough one on me, for sure. These sleepless nights are killing me, and I mean that literally. It’s just too much… too often.
With that in mind, let me finish by giving some advice to anyone thinking of going into nursing. If you don’t want to work weekends or holidays then chose another career (or work for our agency, it would seem).
I agree with that if you want weekends and holidays off, don’t go into nursing. When I worked at the hospital, I worked every Sunday, even if it was Mother’s day, father’s day, easter, etc. which weren’t considered holidays and wasn’t given holiday pay. I too feel frustrated with the night staff I having working for me. I don’t use an agency so I have no back up when they choose not to work. Ughhh… I feel your pain. I hope you got a nap yesterday.
Your post is painful to read, Ken, but I know it is just a taste of what you go through every day. I don’t know if there is an answer to the nursing situation, but I am praying that it will somehow be resolved. Do you actually sleep even when a nurse is present? This is what worries me! But then, considering the trauma in your life, I don’t know how you sleep at all — most likely, simply pass out from tiredness!
I hope the Easter Bunny left you some good chocolate and jelly beans. It was such a beautiful day! At least you had that, and I hope you got outdoors to enjoy the sun, however windy. March winds continue into April — what the heck!
Are you seeing any new changes in Ryan? So exciting to see the videos — thank you and the good Lord for his unbelievable progression toward healing.
Always here for you, as we all are, with much love and many prayers.
Wow! I guess it’s easy to forget that Nurses have lives and family too. It would be nice if the Nursing agency notified you, but it’s not the nurses fault You didn’t remember. Learn to appreciate what you do have even if you can’t remember the date.
Best wishes!
I certainly don’t blame the nurse for my poor memory (or lack of importance attached) that it was Easter. I hold her accountable for not covering her shift, holiday or not. I neither remembered nor forgot that nurses have lives and family, because it is not directly (or even indirectly) applicable here. Finally, the statement to “learn to appreciate what you do have even if you can’t remember the date” is confusing. What does that mean?
Seriously, Larry! “Learn to appreciate what you do have…” What does Ken have that he should appreciate? Exhaustion because of someone’s selfishness? No nurse because someone’s feelings were hurt that a man that cares for his son 24 hours a day doesn’t feel like entertaining said nurse? Really? Yes, the nurse has a life but she also has a job that has sensitive consequences if she decides she wants the day off. Sounds like she had it pretty good working with Ryan but, Ken and Sue, you don’t need that kind of person for your precious son! I will be praying that the agency finds you a replacement with no interruption of services!!
AMEN all around Jennifer.
Always, forever and until.
With love and in prayer,
Keri, My Frankie and Family
AMEN all around Jennifer.
Larry, please put yourself in the Diviney’s Shoes for just one “hellish” moment…if you dare?? What if it were YOUR child or better yet, YOUR RELATIVE (the nurse) that was in need of another Nurses 24 hour care? How would you feel? Would your answer be the same? Would you be able to “brush it off” so readily, if the nurse that you were counting on, to care for your loved one, not only didn’t attend their ALREADY SCHEDULED SHIFT, but didn’t care enough to be be sure that it was covered BEFORE they canceled out- especially if the reason were because their ALREADY AGREED TO SCHEDULED TIME wasn’t “convenient” to them on this particular day?
Always, forever and until.
With love and in prayer,
Keri, My Frankie and Family
Oh Ken. Bless your heart. I so feel your frustration, tiredness and just about everything else. I only know to continue to lift you up in prayer and to remind that truly you are NOT alone.
Hang in there big guy. God Bless you.
Hello Ken,
Was wondering if you are allowed to have more than one agency working for you. I am truly hoping you are able to fit in some rest times today. Need to red marker the holidays and get a commitment from the nurse (or agency) in advance that they’ll be there. This situation has to be fixed somehow. I feel so bad for you, Ken…I hardly know what to say, except — I’m beside you and your family in spirit. I pray somehow today you will be able to get some desperately needed sleep. I’m sorry this has been such a hard weekend. You, Ryan, Sue and Kari are in our hearts and on our minds. Lord, please let today be a better day.
Love & hugs, prayers always
Paula
Well I guess you could be working in a grocery store. Then have to come home and spend the day with your family.
I can feel your frusteration, and I hope this venting helps you cope with it :'(
You don’t know me, but I pray for you often during the day. My little ones also pray for “Ryan, the boy we don’t know” in their bedtime prayers. It’s little comfort, but hopefully it will have a cumulative effect.
Our nurse was at least scheduled Easter night, but she called off. And the phone rang at 6am telling us that the day nurse has now called off and she knew the previous nite shift was open because I texted her to see if she could come any earlier!
Ken, That’s really awful,I would think there should always be someone as an alternate,guess not 🙁 Hope it was a calm night and today you can someway get some rest.With all you have to do each day ,you certainly need a little sleep.Again,I’m there in spirit, I know that really doesn’t help.Hoping there will be some help today Always here Love gai
Ken, sorry to hear about the nurse. I know holidays blend into the sameness of the days, and I can only imagine your struggles. Pain, anger, fear, sorrow aside, you are stronger than you know. Hope there is a little time for you to grab a a cat nap today….
I’m so sorry to hear this… I haven’t slept the past 2 nights myself, but then I don’t have to accomplish all that you must each day. I’m hoping that having Kari home for the holiday weekend brought you an extra measure of joy despite the nurseless night, although saying goodbye to her this morning will make today that much harder I’m sure. Please know that we are all here for you and praying you through each day and night. I hope that you and Ryan have a completely “boring” day so you can just function on autopilot until you’re able to crash tonight.
That just sucks. Those are my words of support today. Just blows.
I’m awake too! You’re not alone, never alone. I’m watching my live Africa cam and chatting with friends in Canada, Germany, Amsterdam & UK. I’m sorry about the holiday, but it’s almost over! Try to get some extra sleep on Monday!