Here we go. Now officially into our third year. Or, as I call it, round three.
Since the opening bell, I came our aggressive. But, this also leaves me wide open to punishing blows. Yes, if I go down it will be swinging. Along the way I managed to stay on my feet, perhaps wobbly and exhausted, but never hitting the canvass. People think this is strength. It’s fear.
I’m battered and bruised… not even close to the man I was. I’ve grown both stronger and weaker at the same time. I grew infinitely wiser, but curse this new knowledge. You know, people really don’t give blissful ignorance the true credit it deserves.
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What happened to Ryan (and how he suffers and survives) shines a light on all the is right and wrong, albeit on a small-scale. The classic clash between the good and the bad. It spotlights the righteous and illuminates the darkness in which evil lurks. This light pulls both ways — love and hate, hope and despair, sadness and elation — a tug-of-war where the rope is nothing but a hair-thin, frayed thread. This, to me, might be the greatest reason people are drawn in. It engages every emotion. It forces people to pick a side. Reality television has nothing on this… am I right?
Today, just like the past 730 day before will be no different. We’ll dig in our heels and hope to not lose ground. Hey, if we’re lucky, we might even gain a little.
We just need Ryan’s light to keep shining.
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I had a vivid dream lastnight that Ryan was walking and talking. I’ve never met you all before but in my dream, Ryan was throwing a football and at one point, he ran down the hill to retrieve the ball. I told him that he should take it easy and not be running but he was determined. He was wearing a white t-shirt and jeans and was rubbing his left shoulder as he ran. He has a slight drag in one of his feet but I can’t remember which. He had a scruffy beard/5 o’clock shadow and his hair was greasy (needed a good washing). That’s all I can recall about the dream but it gave me some hope for his recovery. Just thought I’d share 🙂
It must be the week for it, because a few nights ago, mine was about Ryan’s first words being “Turkey leg. Turkey, want turkey, want turkey.” He would not stop saying it. Ken, Sue, and Kari were laughing so hard with joy that they were crying. Ryan asked “Why crying? Turkey burn?” We all have such high hopes that Ryan is so close to emerging.
Hoping Ryan has a good day tomorrow. You guys are in our thoughts and prayers. God bless you.
I’m glad these last few days are over. I have spent them focused on the negative. Like all of us I am so incredibly angry for what has happened to Ryan and to those that love him. I am going to put that aside and focus once again on being positive. Please know that we are still here and always will be.
As far as I’m concerned, there’s only ONE side and that’s yours and we’re ALL on it!!! SHSP in Morgantown
Ken, you and your family ARE stronger than you know. Although it can never take away the pain and anguish surrounding Ryan, his family and his friends, maybe you can take a little solace in this thought: Austin will never know peace for the rest of his life. Once he gets back in the real world and real people give him a reality check, his life will be a living Hell. The so-called friends he clings to now will abandon him and start seeing him for what he is….a felon with a temper that can blow at any time. If they’re smart, they will not stick around for the day he unleashes his temper on them over something stupid. His family? The ones who’ve been telling him all along he was not wrong? What happens when he decides he’s heard enough of their bs and blames them for his problem? You read about a kid unleashing on his own parents every single day. Will they realize how wrong they were to condone his behavior then? Doubtful. There are people like that everywhere and it is really depressing.
However…..Ken, if you let anger at Vantrease for what he did to Ryan rule your life for long…a day, an hour, or even a minute…..then Vantrease is still winning that day, that hour, that minute., and he does not deserve to win. Don’t let him win. Don’t let him continue to take that precious time away from you and your family. Ryan needs you all, and he IS going to win this.
We choose love. Love for Ryan, love for you and Sue and Kari. Shine on, Divineys <3
Winning (this was my word before the now infamous Charlie was born)! And happy to be on the right side, tugging with you, although the rope on our side should be touching the ground. We are — TEAM DIVINEY! And we are — WINNING! We have so much to be thankful for, most especially for Ryan’s recovery. He has come a long, long way in these two years. We know the road has not been an easy one, but your decision to stay with Ryan and over-see his care is the right one! I think about what you and your family are going through all the time, and I pray for your perseverance and continued good health, both physically and mentally. I can’t imagine how difficult it was to write yesterday, but we are glad you did. If we had to describe you in one word, it would be “real,” because you are real in every sense of the word. Love you all, here for you always, and really, as the crow flies, we are not that far away.
Ken, that was beautifully written…no, it was perfectly written.
Your diligence, devotion and dedication to Ryan add up to one thing: Love wins.
I so admire you.
Love & prayers always,
Paula
Ken,
As far as I am concerned, getting through yesterday is a victory in and of itself. And, I am placing my faith in the fact that the victory for Ryan has already been won, and it’s only a matter of time before he himself speaks to the evil set upon him. The Light is upon Ryan, and will continue to shine.
Glad to hear you came out of yesterday swinging!
We are on the side of the “light”. Good trumps evil always in the end. We will stay on your team and keep our eyes on the light of Christ and continue in faithful prayers for Ryan’s complete healing.
Dear Ken, It is a tug of war but love, hope and elation will be the winner and really has been these last 2 years ,to see how Ryan has progressed due to the wonderful ,loving care he gets from you, Sue and Kari..Something is giving you all the strength to go on and I,m sure you are more the man than ever before ,Thinking and praying always for all. Love Gail