We Got This!

"I tell him I tried. I tried to keep memory alive; I tried to fight those who would forget. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. There is so much injustice & suffering crying out for our attention. We must take sides. We must interfere. -E.W.

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Happy Birthday, Ryan

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At 12:38am last night, Ryan officially turned 22 years old. My birthday wish for him? I hope he is somehow happy.

It’s an emotional day for us. A mixing of celebration and raw sadness. A day where we will go through the motions and maybe even pretend — at least for a few minutes — that everything is okay. I just hope it’s not like last year, where we couldn’t hold it together for very long.

I can tell you this, we are not off to a good start. Not a good one at all.

Our family’s tradition is to make a full-blown breakfast and deliver it on a tray. We will all walk into the bedroom and sing “Happy Birthday to You”. Then, sit on the bed and and talk about the birthday person. It was a special time that we all loved and looked forward to. I miss doing this with Ryan. He loved the attention.

I miss doing so much with him.

Anyhow, instead we’ll defer the singing to this evening so Kari will be with us via video-chat. I’ll read Ryan all the birthday wishes he gets during the day. We’ll surround him with love and attention. We’ll talk about the good times.

I’m having a rough time writing this post today. If you don’t mind, I think it’s best for me to stop.

Ryan, how I wish you a happy birthday. I love you and miss you. Please come back to us.

 

 

Comments

  1. Belated HAPPY 22ND BIRTHDAY, Ryan. I cried when i read your Dad’s post today (from yesterday)–they really miss you, Ryan, in every way possible. Please keep fighting–you are absolutely so courageous in your battle to come back to your family. You have no idea how badly they want you back….or maybe you do and that is why you keep fighting, every minute of everyday. You want to come back, too. Anyone who has visited your site, has fallen in love with you and your family dear Ryan. You are beyond precious and we all want you back. Always love, thoughts and prayers for you. I pray the coming year will be a banner one for you…..Love, Annie xoxo

  2. Happy Birthday dear Ryan.
    Staying by your side every day.
    Sending our love and b-day wishes from Connecticut.

  3. Happy Birthday Ryan! We love you very much and forever hope and pray for you to awaken and recover. We miss your smile, the sparkle in your eye, and your energy. Never giving up and always praying for your special miracle. God love you, keep you, and heal you.
    Love, Peggie

  5. Still thinking of you all and praying for your family daily! As always, I wish you nothing but the best and today I’m hoping that it comes with a side of cake! Happy Birthday! I hope this year is filled with good health, lots of laughs and love.

  6. Happy Birthday sweet Ryan. I know your friends at WVU miss you and celebrate your birthday. They are so happy & grateful to be your friend and to have celebrated so many crazy fun times with you and look forward to sharing many more. You inspire them every day. We pray that this will be a year of great progress. Keep up the good work honey. We all love you past the sky! HAPPY BIRTHDAY RYAN!! xoxo

  7. Happy Birthday, Ryan! We’re all still here and praying for your continued healing and recovery. As I’m sure you’re well aware, the #2 ranked LSU Tigers roll into Morgantown for a night game this Saturday. I think there may be a late birthday surprise for you in the form of a nationally televised upset. Looking forward to meeting you someday; until then keep getting better every day. All the best from Texas.

  8. Happy Birthday to Ryan! Still reading everyday, and still praying for you! Keep fighting, hope is strong and the love of your family is amazing!

  9. Happy birthday Ryan. We all know where you should be tonight. I hope you enjoyed the video. I’m sure it was bitter- sweet for your parents but hopefully it brought some happiness for you. Your friends continue to miss you everyday. Keep fighting Ryan. You are loved and missed my friend.

  11. My dearest Ryan, we all have birthday wishes for you today, but most of all, we are so grateful for your life. You are fighting so hard every day to come back and enjoy life with your friends and family and we are all so inspired by that. All of our lives are better for “knowing” you, even though many of us have never had the pleasure of meeting you in person. You make us better, more gentler, more caring people. I know that I go out of my way here in Minnesota to help people that need just a little more help, because of you. Because I am so grateful to have met those that have loved you and our family so much through your battle. Keep fighting Ryan, you have been in my thoughts all day long, actually for 22 months. HAPPY BIRTHDAY sweet boy!

  13. Praying for a special birthday for you Ryan! Don’t forget tonite is Wednesday and let all this birthday talk go to your head….your show is on tonite. The season premier of Modern Family! I remember when Jon told us about this show and that you boys had been watching it for at least a season before I discovered it. He was telling us how you boys were laughing and having a fun time watching it on Wednesday nights. I know they are thinking about you today and missing you everyday, not just your birthday. Have a great video chat with Kari and bring on some laughs tonite with Modern Family. Happy Birthday Ryan, Love ya!

  14. Happy Birthday Ryan! Today our family celebrates your birthday and my husband, Jeff’s birthday! As we blow out the candles, all our wishes are on you for this special day!

  16. Ken, I do really think Ryan is happy and hears you and knows all the wonderful attention he ‘s getting and he will come back to you .Don’t give up hoping no matter what (easy for me to say huh?) Try to enjoy this ,his special day My prayers and thoughts will be with you all. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RYAN!”. Love Gail. hugs for you too Ken Sue and Kari,,,,

  17. Ryan,
    Britt always talks about how funny you are. Your dad is trying desperately to come close to your unique humor, but we all know, there is only one Ryan. For those who have not yet personally been blessed with your humorous side, come on out and show them what you’re made of. If the world thinks your DAD is clever, wait till they hear from you!!
    Thank you for blessing this world with your arrival 22 short years ago; come on back and show the world what funny really is.

    Lots of love from Miss Cass 🙂

  18. Happy, happy and an even HAPPIER Birthday, sweet kiddo of mine!

    Ken, sometimes when I am overwhelmed with sadness, I say to myself, “For just this one day (or hour or 15 min) I will choose to be happy.” Much easier to say then do I know, but at least for me it does work. I wish I could wrap my arms around all of you and say something miraculous that would make all of this go away. I am at a loss for words to say.

    Sue’s Crew had a wonderful meeting last night, lifting you up in prayer and trying to figure out what and how else we can help you. I am so blessed to be a part of this group that lives and breathes Ryan.

    Please know I will continue to keep our Ryan relevant, 1st act changing my status to wishing Ry a happy birthday. I know that I mentioned it before, but, can all that read this blog make a commitment to sharing Ryan’s story with three new people a week? Think of all the people that are missing out on knowing Ryan and all who love him.

    Happy Birthday Ry, you look pretty darn handsome at 22!

  19. To someone who is cherished beyond measure and more than words can express,
    To someone who daily inspires hundreds, if not millions, to love, honor and be their best,
    To a young man of promise, greatness and infinite value,
    on this day, your day, we all say,
    “I love you.”

    Happy Birthday, Ryan.

  20. To someone who is cherished beyond measure and more than words can express,
    To someone who daily inspires hundreds, if not millions, to love, honor and be their best,
    To a young of promise, greatness and infinite value,
    on this day, your day, we all say,
    “I love you.”

    Happy Birthday, Ryan.

  21. Happy birthday, Ryan. This is a day to celebrate your life–a day to remember the good times! I hope your cake has lots of chocolate or marshmallow frosting, whichever you like best. But now that I think about it, there is German chocolate, cream cheese, caramel, butter-creme, strawberry (my favorite), and the list goes on. I’ll make you a deal, Ryan, and it is this: when you are up to it, I will make your very favorite frosted cake–from scratch, of course–and fight the roads and traffic and bring it over to you. Love to all on this very special occasion.

  23. My heart breaks for all of you as you long to celebrate such a special day. I hope you find peace and comfort in being together and know that Ryan is so very fortunate to have you. Happy Birthday, Ryan – you are an inspiration to so many people. We’re all here, waiting to meet you!

  24. Happy 22nd Birthday Ryan!!!! Can I ask a favor of you honey? Your mom, dad, and Kari are having a tough time with this day as they are riding a never-ending roller coaster of emotions…..Can you give them a “thumbs up” today, maybe when you have your video-chat with Kari? Love and continued prayers today and always. Ryan, you’re in my heart buddy. Love, Miss Lib

  27. Dear Ryan,

    Happy Birthday!! Just wanted to say thank you for being such a wonderful inspiration to so many people. You are definitely a person who knows how to work very hard to overcome tough things. You have become so strong, and every day you are getting stronger. In the last two years, you have shown what it means to be courageous and brave. You have accomplished more in these two years than many people do in a lifetime. And we are all so proud of you!!

    So today, on your 22nd birthday, I want you to know how very special and how very loved you are by so many people. Every day, there are lots of your friends, neighbors, classmates from West Virginia University, people in Ashburn, Morgantown, Maryland, Pennsylvania, New York and all across the country praying for you and thinking good thoughts about you.

    Ryan, you give a lot of joy to everyone who knows you, and to many people you’ve never even met. Not many people can say they have touched as many lives as you have. Not many people can say they have worked as hard, fought as strongly and demonstrated the extraordinary determination you have. You have a lot to be proud of!!

    Happy 22nd Birthday, dear Ryan!! Today we are celebrating you, not just because you are an amazing young man, but also because of the way you inspire us to try harder ourselves. For this, you are loved, respected and admired, and you should be very, very proud of yourself.

    Love and prayers for you, dear Ryan, and I’m still here believing the grace of our Lord will carry us through.
    Paula

    • Paula, now you have me thinking in terms of a TV special or a movie. Anderson, Oprah, anybody–can you hear us? !! Did anyone see the segment on Ellen yesterday about the movie 50/50?

  28. Happy Birthday, Ryan – we have some cool additions to our basement that you would love. Mr. T moved our old kitchen fridge downstairs and turned it into a double kegerator complete with two taps. Yes, we have Blue Moon and Yuengling. We love you, sweetie! Mrs. T

  30. Happy Birthday, Ryan!! I continually keep you and all of your family in my thoughts and prayers daily. Sincerely, Beth

  38. Happy Birthday to you!
    Happy Birthday to you!
    Happy Birthday DEAR Ryan!
    Happy Birthday to you!

    Here’s to a great day for Ryan and his family.

  39. Dear Ken, Today I give you another virtual hug that will not take away your pain, but might somehow continue to remind you that we are still here, still praying and never going anywhere. After dropping my daughter at elementary school today, I saw a kid lying on the ground with two boys standing over him. Despite my pajamas and bed head, I immediately pulled over and got out and make sure the little kid was ok. I told the other boys I was calling the school to report them, that what they were doing was bullying, and it was not acceptable behavior. If we can get it into little boys heads that pushing others to the ground is NOT o.k., then maybe when they are big boys they will remember. I wish someone had imparted that to Vantrease and Mays. I will never again miss an opportunity to take a stand against bullying. Take the time to remember the good stuff today, Ken.

    You are, and always will be, my hero.

  40. Happy Birthday sweet Ryan. You should still give him the attention – sit and talk to him and tell him how much we all love him – how many people love him – how special we all feel to be a part of your lives. He will feel the love, I hope.
    Have a wonderful day and give him lots of hugs. He’s here, he’s relevant, he’s precious.

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Ryan's Rally, ℅ Ken Diviney
21092 Carthagena Ct.
Ashburn, VA 20147
kdiviney@ryansrally.org