I’ve watch the sunrise so many mornings, that it’s like listening to an old song. It reminds me I’m alive — good or bad — I’m alive and it really doesn’t matter what day it is. Every day is mostly the same as the last. I really don’t care if it’s Saturday or Monday. It’s a voiceless melody that speaks to me. It tells me it’s a new day, were anything can happen before I see it the next morning. It makes no promises as to whether it will be favorable. Still, there are many mornings were I wonder if this might be the last day the sun might shine. In many ways, this would not be at all unwelcome.
There’s something calming, yet ominous, about a sunrise. Am I right? The night sky turns to an eerie shade of dark purple just before it seems to it wash it with orange and red. Really, this is the best the sun can do (and it goes by so quickly) before the yellow rays overtake out the vibrant colors.
Most of the year Ryan is up before the sun. Hell, we laugh that it’s such a late-riser. Every morning I wake Ryan with the simple message, “it’s going to be a great day” and “we have a busy day ahead”.
No doubt, it will be busy. The next fifteen hours be filled with activities and care. But sometimes I feel like I’m fibbing by telling him it’ll be great. Fact is, I really don’t know what the day will bring for him.
What if it’s awful?
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Ann H Tearle says
Ken, I don’t think we are supposed to write the “pictures”……When we wake up each morning, it’s a brand new day, a new 24-hours….to watch unfold. Whatever comes, you deal with it. Haven’t you always? No matter what, you rise to the occasion for Ryan, yourself, Sue and kari. You wouldn’t have it any other way. Some days are diamonds and some days are stones, and some days just suck, though we try our best….but, we continue on…….and look toward the next new day….Prayers always, thoughts and love, Annie
The Colangelis says
There are very few things more beautiful (IMO) than a sunrise and a sunset. It’s interesting you mention this because I’ve noticed the beauty of them over the last couple of weeks now. Last night’s sunset and this morning’s colorful sky were amazing. Hope tomorrow is a good day for you and Ryan.
Donna says
One of the greatest gifts that God gave us is not knowing what the day will hold. We move on by looking up and knowing that no matter what, he is with us. He is the only reason to move on, some days.
Will says
With a Dad a Mom and a sister like you guy’s how can even a moment in a day be awful!! Even the dog fits in this picture. And what a beautiful picture this family is. It’s like that sunrise you speak about.
Kyne says
State of mind can make or break your day. My attitude is…..Somebody has it worse than me! This applies to everyone in any situation they find themselves in.
Paula says
Hi Ken, if nothing else, you are in that part of the population that can look in the mirror and say, “I know I have done my best to help my son;” and Ryan can say, “I know I am doing my best to fully heal.” A lot of people don’t even try.
No one knows what the next hour will bring, and I’m not sure I’d want to know even if I could. All I know is what I’ve got in my hand at this moment. Control = we have none…love, hope and the grace of God — yes, we have that. You = a wonderful Dad, Husband, Son and Friend. There are many who can’t say that, either, and yet those are the things that mean the most in this life.
Sending love, hugs and lots of hope. Still here and still believing.
Paula
KathrynHowlett says
What if…….well, as others have said we never know. Now is the moment we have and all we can do is embrace this one moment….love your son, find beauty in the sunrise and sunsets, embrace the “business” of the day, hug your wife, be kind to yourself, and know that there are many, many people here who like you, wonder, “what if”, but still give thanks for the moment that is right now: you loving your son, being there for him, telling him “it is going to be a great day”……breathe deeply and for a moment my you find a small feeling of calm.
Maureen says
Scott that was beautifully said. Many days I awake with a feeling of uncertainity and very anxious feeling in my stomach; not even knowing why. So I say outloud “something good is going to happen to me today”! All things revolve around your state of mind and how your receiving signals and perception of things are working in any given moment. God said…we spend more time thinking into the future than the present or the past. He warned us aginst doing that for as long as we embrace the lord he will embrace in our days ahead. I know you think allot Ken. I do too. My son had a severe kick to the temple as well and we were left unknowing. I learned from my son that all the external things we were doing were great but something had to reach his inner being to pull him up and out of the darkness he was in. I believe Ryan is trying with all his might to rejoin his family in a cognitive way but just needs something something to get him up over the wall; over that block that has him stumbling. Angels watch over you and your family and especially Ryan. Hey Ken, something Good is going to happen today ! ๐
Scott says
Wow….something to reach his inner being and get him up over that wall. Beautifully said.
Jo says
And wasn’t the sunrise this morning beautiful? Now we have the calm after the storm. The next several days will be calm according to my weather man, Topper Shutt. Of course, another storm is approaching from the west. Life is like the weather, calm at times and stormy at times–sometimes more storms, it seems. I often think of this quote by the mystic, Kahlil Gibran: When happiness sits at your table, trouble lies asleep in your bed. A bit depressing, so I would rather think more in this order: Even though there is trouble at the moment, something good is just around the corner, and that’s what’s about to happen next! Wishing you and yours all good things. God loves you, so do we, and just so you know, your writing just makes my day complete. Always here with hope, faith and love.
Carla Liberty says
Ken,
You are experiencing/living an incredible emotional roller coaster ride through no fault of your own. You have been thrust into a situation that no parent should have to face. The key is, you are doing right by Ryan. Keeping up the good attitude and telling Ryan it is going to be a good day is huge because I (and others I am sure) believe that Ryan can sense your emotions. I’m sure he can sense if you are sad as well. When you experience the down days, we will all help to lift you up. Ryan needs you to remain positive; he’s working so hard to come back to you ๐ SHSP, NGA, RKD – FTW!
Love, carla
Cass says
Understood. What if it is awful?
But…. What if it isn’t?
I’m praying that today will be Ryan’s best day yet.
Lots of love and prayers,
Cass
Gail Doyle says
Ken, No we don’t know if the day will be the same the next sunrise ,but i sincerely believe in my heart that Ryan will see many ,many sunrises and each one will bring him closer to healing. We are here for you and pray each sunrise will bring a good day .Thinking of you ( hope it helps a little ) always . Give Ryan a big hug and yourself too ! Love Gail
Helen M. Causin says
With a father like you by his side “for each and every moment” how could it be awful….I wish only the very best for you and your family.
Sott says
If any of us could accurately predict the outcome of any certain day, then we might be tempted to stay in bed and let that day pass us by. But what if something changed, and instead something wonderful happened that day? We’d miss it and maybe never get that opportunity again. Don’t let the “what ifs?” stand in your way of seizing the day for whatever it may bring. Find joy in your time with Ryan and look forward to that next sunrise.
Scott says
See? And there are some days you can’t even spell your own name correctly! Scott, not Sott!!
Cass says
I have days like those! But with a name like Cass, if I can’t spell my name correctly, well, it takes on a whole different meaning! Just saying. ๐