Yesterday was, effectively, a lost day in my life.
Except for getting up to eat and use the bathroom I slept right through it. Over a twenty-six hour period, I slept somewhere around twenty-four! I would have slept even longer, if not for my alarm going off this morning.I didn’t intend for this to happen. On Saturday night I asked Sue if she would get up with Ryan in the morning so I could get some extra sleep. I woke at 8:30am; long enough to use the bathroom and asked her if she wouldn’t mind if I slept a bit longer. The next thing I knew it was three o’clock in the afternoon. I was angry at myself for sleeping through the first half of the Washington game and put it on. I only remember one or two series — long enough to eat a sub — and fell back asleep without realizing it.
I woke again at nine that night. Peed. Ate. Fell asleep.
It’s been an exhausting summer. Mostly because of the stress of Ryan not having his left skull plate. The past month has pushed me to the breaking point and I suppose my body just could not tolerate it any longer. It gave me no choice. It’s obvious I was in desperate need of rest, but I feel overwhelmed with guilt for not being available.
As for Ryan, it looks like the surgery to get this plate back in will happen next week. This really can’t happen soon enough for me.
By now I expect that many people reading this article are wanting for me to “take some time to take care of yourself” or to tell me “there will be better days ahead.” Please, don’t. That’s not what I’m looking for. Remember what I said many times before…
That’s not how this tragedy works.