Good bye, 2011. I hardly even knew you. Not that I ever really wanted to, anyhow.
It’s true, too. The year is just a mental blur. It’s like pieces from a huge jigsaw puzzle that someone spilled out onto the table. Yes, they’re all there but entirely unorganized. I remember things happening, but sequencing them is a problem. To me, Christmas feels like it might have happened months-and-months ago just as easily as last week. Even the season throughout the year are difficult to place. These are like the jigsaw’s corner pieces in that I know their relative position, but am unable to decide which corner each might anchor.
I seriously doubt I’ll every take the time to put this puzzle together. What’s the point? The picture it would slowly bring to life is not one I’d like to see anyway. So, perhaps, the best thing to do is to pull out the pieces I recognize (like all the fundraising events, construction projects, and those showing your kindness) and toss the rest back into the flimsy cardboard box. I’ll store it a plastic bin next to the jigsaw puzzle of 2010. I’ll label the bin, in permanent maker, “The Dark Years” so it’s easily recognizable.
Like the past two years, I enter 2012 with unyielding resolve. I will never quit — not even slow down — until I’m being carried away. That’s not to say I won’t be smacked down or buckled at the knees from time-to-time. It will happen… a lot. By damn, getting back up will always happen.
This is neither heroic nor remarkable. It’s simply what parents do when their children need them. I’m matching my response to the situation. Yes, there is nothing that equals this peril as a parent — it is clearly the most extreme — and it requires every bit of me, and help from others, just to make it through each day.
But, making it to a another new day means another shot at happiness. No matter how foolish I am to not give up and that it will almost certainly end in heartache. There’s still a chance… I hope.
For those in the Washington D.C. metro area, please tune in to NBC-4 at noon today for the premier of Michael & Son’s series “Helping Hands”. It will feature Ryan.
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